being ill

My sister told me whenever I had a tummy ache it was my unborn twin inside my stomache trying to get out.

Jamie Field

I used to believe that cramps were called crabs because that's how I heard it. So if I would be running and got a cramp, I would say "Ouch. I have crabs! They're pinching me!"

Carl

I thought a heart attack was when you got attacked by your brother or sister. So I'd say she's a heart attacking me!!!

TImmy

I used to believe that if you broke your arm (or whatever) it came completely off.

Jill

I used to be that diarrhoea was an ear infection (dire ear). I recall one time when my mum's friend was telling her that she had a bad case of it and I piped up saying 'I get that often too, especially if I've been poking my ears!'

Penny

When I was eight I had to have an especially stubborn tooth pulled, in another city. When my mom told my teachers that I would miss school because I was having "oral surgery" I burst into tears, because I thought that meant "very serious surgery", and I was surely on my deathbed.

Anon

When I was 9 years old, my best friend's dad owned a liquor store. He kept excess stock in his basement.
Well, my friend and I both pretended to be sick one day so we could stay home from school, and he brought a six-pack of beer & a liter of vodka to my house for our very first grown-up party.
After maybe 3 shots, I was ... well, praying to the porcelain god is the best way to put it.
Several hours later, my Mom came home to find me, in the bathroom, sleeping with my porcelain idol in a daze of alcoholic stupor.
For whatever reason, she decided I had learned my lesson and told me that I was suffering from "Russian Flu" and could stay home from school the next day, too.
I didn't figure out there wasn't a Russian Flu until I was 21!

David S.

as a kid i used to believe that when doctors "diagnosed" someone with a disease it meant that they gave them the disease. Whenever i heard that someone was diagnosed with cancer or soem disease i would think to myself why did they give them the disease? lol

Gregster

When I was little I hated all people on crutches, becaue my dad was on crutches, and he was very mean and yelled a lot. It wasn't until I was in high school and one of my best friends got in an accident and is on crutches, that I realized that mean and angry is not contingent upon crutches.
My apologies to all the handicapped people that I didn't hold the door open for.

I'll never tell.

When I was in about 6th grade, we had a (female) gym teacher who told us girls that if we got hit in the breast with a softball, we should rub the place to prevent the bruise from developing into breast cancer later. So I guess kids are not the only ones with dumb beliefs.

child of the '50's

The first time we visited close family friends after staying away because the kids had chicken pox, I was looking for the feathers on the floor.

HorntoadX

I used to believe that when you broke your arm or leg it actually broke off your body

MM

When I was about 3 my mother once told me I would catch cold from the draught at the window. I misheard and thought she said "giraffe" not "draught"
I believed that people caught colds from giraffes breathing down on them. I remember explaining this to other children in school.

Flanno

My Gran used to tell me that if I went out in the rain without a hat on I would get polio (from about age 3 onwards). I must have looked real odd in the hats my Gran used to knit for me. They were all hideous. Strange thing is, she told me this again when I was 33, but I refused to wear the dire object that was handed to me.

Anon

When I was young and I didn't want to go to school, my mom used to make me use one of those 'under-the-arm' thermometers to make sure that I really had a fever.
I used to go into my room, close my door, and hold my breath for as long as I could, because I thought this would raise my temperature.

It never did.

David

I read in a book that if you ever swallowed toothbrush bristles then you would get appendicitus!

Amy

I didn't know there was such a thing as Down's Syndrome when I was a little kid. When I saw kids with this affliction on tv I just assumed they were all from the same unfortunate-looking family.

toon

I used to think that the chicken pox were a group of chickens that went door to door to visit every kid before they grew up. I also thought that the chickens would peck your skin and that is what made the red marks.

April

Well, you know how your parents would always tell you to come in out of the rain or you would catch a cold? And how sickness was caused by germs ("coughs and sneezes spread diseases"). I got very of the rain - it must have been full of germs, or how else would you catch a cold from it?

Jess

I used to belive that if i put my foot in my mouth, I would get foot-and-mouth illness

Emily Sathrota