farting

when i was on the toilet my farting said somthing in french

toilet head

When I was twelve years old, my friend Jason was telling his friends that only guys farted, and that girls never did. Well, my farts were so smelly, and I thought I was male for three months until Jason convinced me that I was a girl. He also told me that girls farted too :3.

Chloe Smith

I truly believed my dad had a Magic Finger. Every time I pulled it, he farted. It wasn't until I was about 8 that I figured out it was more of a timing thing.

Joe

I was always a quizzical kid. Back in the mid 1970's, I was asking what the word "leisure" was. My sister, who was getting tired of all of my questions, told me that "leisure" meant "fart". Of course my next question was why would anybody want to wear a "fart suit". Even today when certain body functions are churnning, I say that I "leisured".

Aaron

My old baby-sitter oddly named farts 'churchies'. She mentioned this several times and, not knowing the correct name was fart, believed that only people who didn't attend church had bad gas.

Marshmello Da Strawberry Cow

When my daughter was two, she passed gas, and with this surprised look on her face, announced "My bottom burped"!

Anon

When I was 3 my friend told me that if you ate a bigmac from Mcdonalds it would make you fart so bad you would start flying and then you would go to space and you would have to stay there forever.I actualy believed it! I was afraid of eating anything from there for a while.

Ryne Potts

When I was a kid someone told me that if you farted underwater, the bubbles would make you explode.

I never farted underwater...

A Person

My babysitter told me that if you swallowed your gum, the next time you pooted, a bubble would come out of your butt.

Anon.

We had a golden retriever who farted constantly in his sleep. I asked my dad why it was doing that and he said: "It's because his skin is too tight, each time he closes his eyes, his butt hole opes and lets out gas!"

Erika

when i was a little girl, i beleived that women didnt have bums, because i never heard my mom fart.

Anon

That only men farted. I literally started sobbing the first time I realized I farted.

Anon

One of my elementary school mates once told me that if you burped and farted at the same time, you would die.

It was hard to test, and I was afraid to, but once the feat actually occurred and I didn't die, I figured it must've been because it wasn't _exactly_ the same moment.

McAlpine

When I was little every time my day would fart he would say it was a mouse on a motorcycle. I never saw any reason not to belive him. I always pictured something from a Tom and Jerry episode. Eventually I figured it out.

Anon

I used to believe, well kinda I might, still do a little, I'm uncertian. I once heard that if you farted in the bathtub, and were quick enough to bite the bubble and suck in it's methane contents before it popped, well then you would hallucinate. might sortof like taking LSD I supose I wasn't never quite quick enough to catch the bubble yet..

stinky teeth

I used to believe that if you had to fart and held it in too long that it would cause you to blow up

Anon

When I was little and farted in bed my mum told me to "take big sniffs - it will soon go away" yuk.

Anon

when i was little my dad told me that if i farted on the fire it would blow up so i always tried it and he would yell "BOOM" and it would scare me half to death

FartingAbi

growing up near the mexican border my mom was used to not being understood by spanish-speaking kids so she thought they wouldn't understand any noises she made; burping, farting ect.

Tiffany

When we were little all of my friends and I believed that if you were touched by a person who farted, you would get the fart-touch. to make yourself immune you had to say "rooty-tootie-fresh-and-fruity, knock on wood!" and cross your fingers while counting to ten.

Amy