weeing and pooing

My mum told me as a small child that it was bad to hold it in when I needed a wee, because this was how you got worms. Presumably her intention was to get me to go to the loo before long trips, etc, but it has resulted in an eternal guilty feeling when needing the toilet, that A-level Biology and a degree in Biochemisty has not managed to dispell. My mother, of course, denies all knowledge of this....

Carol

I used to think that no one else could hear me pee! It wasn't like I was magic or something, it's just that I didn't think that peeing made any noise. I figured it out when I realized that for years I had been hearing other people pee.

piss and vinegar

When I was a kid I thought women urinated out of their butts. I had no idea that it came out of anywhere else until I was 18 and I asked my girlfriend if she could fart while peeing. She was so appalled that I didn't know where they urinated from that she showed me in an anatomy book.

Anon

Up until the age of seven, my friend believed that she was the only person who went to the toilet and that there was a toilet wherever she was, in case she needed to go.

Anon

I used to believe that Pinochio was really PEEnochio, and whenever you told a lie you would pee your pants-i was so scared to pee my pants in public i never lied!

sara

Untill I was around 5 I didn't want to go to the bathroom, because each time I went, I thought I was losing a part of my body, and that eventually I would be no more. So one day, I decided to never, ever go to the bathroom again... I held it in for as long as I could (number 2). Then I didn't have to go anymore. Later that week I got sick, they took me to the doctor, and boy was I embarassed.

JM

I used to believe that I could pee out of my bellybutton. I saw my brother peeing while standing up, and since I didn't have a...you know, I figured it must have to come out of the hole. So there I was, standing at the toilet, squeezing my belly button.

Jesse

My sister believed, til she was almost an adult, that if she peed in the pool, it would cause a reaction that would turn the water red and everyone would know. I guess mom told her that to make sure she got out...

TheVinylVillager

When i was little i never wanted to get up to go to the bathroom. So instead just going to the toilet i would eat lots of bread, thinking it would soak up all my pee curing my full bladder. In the end I always ended up giving up and using the restroom

Sydney

When I was little, my brother and I both believed that "fat" people were like that because they never went "potty". This belief was reconsidered at age 8.

Regz

I am a girl who used to believe that if i practised hard enough I would be able to pee standing up like boys. I sat backwards on the toilet for a few weeks then progressed to squatting over the toilet while still facing backwards. Luckily I figured it out before I tried it from a distance.

Anon

I thought it was physically impossible to wet yourself once you were potty trained or wet the bed if you were eleven or older.

Anon

When I was about 8, a friend in the playground told me one break-time that if you pushed too hard while having a "poo", that your brains came out of your bottom. I've never forgotten this and am always a little cautious when it gets to that crutial moment!

Sarah H

When i was little I used to think if I drank water while I was peeing it would go straight through me. I thought if I did thisI wouldn't have to go to the bathroom later on.

AJ

when i was little i told my brother about the brown things that came out of my bum in the toilet and he told me i was abnormal! since then i always thought i was abmormal until we talked about it in school, i was so relieved i thought i was the only one who pooed and that the toilets were only designed for wee and i would break them and everyone would find out that i did poo's!!

lindy mae checker

I used to believe that all children were born girls then if they stood up when they peed enough times then they turned into a boy, well when i went to nursery i told my friend this theory and we both decided life would be much better as a boy, so decided to stand above the toilets when we peed, this resulted in my friend falling and getting her foot stuck in the toilet and the fire brigade having to cut her out. Our teacher was not amused. We were even less amused to find that we were stuck as girls for the rest of our lives. The sex talk came soon after

--m-o-n-i-c-a--

I used to think that "eau de toilette" perfume was a special spray you used to make the bathroom to make it smell nice after you took a poo. So one day after I had a big one I went into my moms room took her most expensive perfume and sprayed it all over the bathroom.

Anon

I believed the handicap symbols on parking spaces were actually pictures of someone sitting on a toilet. So I thought that you were allowed to relieve yourself in that spot. Even though I thought this was quite odd I believed it for many years!

Anon

I used to take showers with my dad. Sometimes, when soaping up, water streamlets would run off his elbow. I was always so disappointed I couldn't pee out of my arm too.

Anon

I used to believe women always peed their pants, and that feminine pads were used like diapers. This was because the liquid used in the pad commercials was always that same blue water you saw in diaper commercials.

Larry