weeing and pooing

When I was 10 I thought Sperm came from your urine. A friend and I both believed this to be true. Then one night he called me and said "I've got sperm! I'm a man now" I asked what he meant...and he told me that he had urinated and saw them swimming around in the toilet. So for the next few days I bent down to closely inspect the toilet for little swimmers after I urinated. Sadly I never saw any...My frustration caused me to finally ask my dad about it. He simply laughed and said "Sperm doesn't come from your pee" without any further explanation.

I figured it out eventually...

Rich

I was firmly convinced that the need to go pee could be countered by consuming an absorbent food, such as crackers or bread. The rationale being that the bread or crackers would absorb the pee, and then you'd buy some pee-time, since poop takes longer to make.

Mollena Williams

I once saw my sisters drinking and wetting doll nude. It had a small hole in its right cheek to wet it self. So naturally I thought all women had a small hole in their right cheek for peeing.

dave

When I was very little my mother insisted that we asked for attention when we needed the toilet. For years I thought that what I was saying "I need a tension" and therefore thought that a poo was actually called "a tension".

Angela

I used to believe that the people who manned the toll booths on highways were not allowed to use the bathroom for the whole day.

Bets

I never knew why boys had to lift up the toilet seat...until my friend told me that boys had bad aim.

Anon

That poop was pee, in solid form

PoopPeeBeliever

When I was under 10 I believed that men pooed out of their penis and it came out like icing does out of one of those cake decorators, only not as pretty.

juliejambuster

I used to believe that african americans poo was brown, caucasian poo was white, asian poo was yellow and anyone who was biracial had the color combination of BOTH races (like a swirl).

Phyllis

When my mom explained to me that tampons and pads were things that women had to use because they had certain bodily functions, I thought that she meant that women wear tampons and pads because there were no bathrooms at work and if they had to go, it would be taken care of by a tampon or pad.

Bryce

This is going to sound sick, but when I was younger I thought pads were for catching extra pee or something. Sort of like a diaper. I thought some women had problems and had extra droppings of pee that the pad caught.

Anon

For the longest time I was convinced I was turning into a volcano. This was my rationalization of poop, which I always refered to as lava. When I had to go to the bathroom, I would announce that I had to go "be a volcano."

Anon

when i was little, i used to think that if a boy peed in a toilet and didnt flush and then a girl peed in it, it would make a baby.

weirdo

I used to believe urine was stored in the testicles, and that was why people on tv crossed their legs tightly when they needed the toilet

Damien

For some reason I got it into my head as a child that when you went to the bathroom only you could hear yourself- kind of like chewing something very crunchy and it sounding much louder in your head.

You could imagine how shocked I was on vacation when through thin walls I heard my mother going number 1 & shouted "Hey! I can hear you pee!" Her response was "Well yes, can't you hear other people pee too?"

It still makes me uncomfortable when I hear or know others can hear me pee in public restrooms!

~JL

When I was a little girl (about 7), me and my family were on holiday in a hotel with paper thin walls. Next door to us, were an immature, Timmy Mallet-like couple and about 3 small kids. One day I had a poo on the toilet and I heard the man say to his wife and kids "Did you just hear that person do a poo?" and the family kept going on about it and laughing about it for about two days. I then thought that I must be part of a small minority of people who did poos and that Mum had just told me that everyone in the world did poos to make me feel better. I felt dirty and disgusting. But I felt miles better when I used the toilet at school one day and saw that another child had done a poo.

Kelly Anna Benji

I was convinced that if my sister and I concentrated hard enough, she could pee for me if I was busy or too lazy to get up and go to the bathroom. Poor girl, she sat on that toilet forever while I berated her for not concentrating enough.

Amanda

When I was 5, I thought everyone had a different colour for their poop. I was really annoyed mine was brown, I wanted blue.

Rainbowpoop

The more you cried, the less you peed.

Anon

As a child, I was told not to shower during a lightning storm because water acts as a conducter for electricity and that if lightning struck a water pipe underground while I was in the shower, I could be electricuted. As a result, I was afraid to urinate during lightning storms because I figured the electricity could travel through the pipes and up the stream of urine to my little guy.

Mr. Silvers