weeing and pooing

Once as a schoolgirl, I was riding home on a bus from a field trip, when I suddenly felt a need to poo real bad! I told the teacher, hoping she could get the bus to stop somewhere where there was a bathroom. But she just told me to hold it in and the urge would go away. I tried that and, although I almost shat in my pants, by the time we got back to school the urge had at least somewhat gone away. I don't even remember whether I poopooed any time for the rest of that day or not. What I do remember is that I got the idea that holding back one's dookey was the good and brave thinig for little girls (maybe boys as well?) to do. Maybe those who best succeeded would eventually become perfect and quit having to crap altogether, so I thought. During the years to come I remember being frequently plagued with stomach cramps, heartburn, and the like. Suspecting no connection at the time, I only regretted that I never completely perfected myself by quitting having to doodoo altogether. Only years later do I now suspect a connection between that belief and my digestive problems!

Samantha

In sex education when we were younger, the girls had a tape to watch about periods and body hair and the like; and the boys had a tape they watched about erections and wet dreams and such. After watching our own videos, we switched and watched the oppostie gender's videos. However, the teacher didn't give us any explanation about what happened to little boys; and the tape was painfully general. Following the scene of poor little Timmy having a "strange accident" in his bed and being too embarrassed to tell his parents, I thought that when boys got older, they all had trouble with peeing the bed.

Anon

When I was little I thought that poop was like a really long sausage link and each piece of poop was one less in your body and that if you pooped enough some day you would poop it all out and never have to go #2 again.

Sara

When I was i kid I used to believe that if i strained too hard while doin #2 I would poop my lungs out...

K.Gordon

My mother had convinced my brother and me that, if we played with fire during the day, we would wet our beds at night... we would laugh at her, but you wouldn't catch us playing with matches if our lives depended on it...!

George

My husband believed that woman peed through their vaginas, and held onto this belief up into his 30's. When I asked him how he expected a woman to pee when she is on her period and using a tampon, he couldn't come up with an answer.

Elissa

I know it sounds mean but to help my toddler, who was terrified of monsters, potty train, my husband and I told him that monsters lived down the toilet hole. The "potty monster" ate poop and pee and if my son used the bathroom in his pants the monsters would come out to him. As long as he used the toilet to feed the monsters they would stay happy and in the toilet. He has been potty trained since he was 2 but now he always flushes even before wiping to make sure the monsters are feed in a hurry.

Anon

When I was six years old our teacher told us that some people drink their own urine. Being blessed by God I never imagined that a glass or some other recepticle would be used. Imagine my teacher's delight and surprise when she found me with head between knees the next day.

Anon

I was convinced for years that I would die if I had diarrhoea. I would get diarrhoea if I tried to wee and poo at the same time because obviously the wee would dilute the poo and make it runny.

Confused from Matlock

I had a friend a few years back (she has since moved away) who told me she wanted to become a vegetrian. She told me that eating meat is what causes you to poop, so that vegetarians don't poop. She said she was looking forward to someday becoming a vegetarian so she wouldn't poop. I decided I wanted to do the same. I tried to quit eating meat but my mother got concerned and persisted in asking me why I was not eating my meat unless she pushed me to. Finally I told her I was trying to become a vegetarian so I would quit pooping. She laughed real loud like it was hilarious and called me a foolish little girl. She told me that there was nothing to what my friend said. Since then, I guess I'm sort of getting used to pooping as an okay thing to do.

Hilary

When I was young, if I ever had a mouthful of food when the need to poo arose, I feared that sitting on the toilet would cause the food to immediately change to poo. Food always felt mushier when sitting on porcelain.

Blackdog

I used to believe that only 'poor' people had to go to the bathroom, that 'rich' people didn't.

Anon

My friend used to think that because he was brown and had brown poo, white people must have white poo. I'm not sure when he discovered the truth

Rachel Bradley

As a toddler i was so aggressively against the idea of toilet training that my parents thought i had something wrong with me. Anyway i was at the doctor's once and he tried to explain to me when i was 3 why i couldn't just hold it in forever like i said i was going to . I came out believing that my left buttock was full of air and my right buttock was full of poop . If i held it in for too long my right buttock would grow so that nothing could get past it.
That scared me!

Anon

My brother used to be scared to poop in the potty. He thought that he was pooping out his bones.

Lillyth

I used to believe that you had a big bottom if you didn't poo enough, that the bottom cheeks held all the poo , so needless to say I used to sit on the toilet for ages

EMH

Once when I was about 4 or 5 I heard my grandmother telling my aunt that one of my other cousins had a tapeworm and when he went to go poo it started coming out and his mom had to pull it the rest of the way out. This scared me so bad that I thought if I went to go poo, a worm would come out of my butt too so I didn't poo for about 2 weeks. My mom finally took me to the doctor and he had to explain to me that I didn't have a tapeworm.

Nelly Waters

Up until i was about 4, i thought u pooed out a baby. so everytime i went poo, i would check to see if there was a baby in the toilet. i was pretty messed up.

Alyssa

I used to think girls peed from their butt.

Neil

I used to believe when i was young my sisters told me if i push out to hard that my body would turn inside out!

Chris