weeing and pooing

When I was little I used to wet the bed alot. My mom and grandma always told me that if I drank my milk this wouldnt happen. So I always made sure to drink all the milk I could. Needless to say I woke up very wet, cold, and crying in the middle of the night. They later made up another story about the bedwetting. One that has caused me to suck my thumb all these years.

anonymous

When I was about 5 years old, I would always wonder how the pooh in the toilet went through the small tubes (the water tubes that stuck out of the wall) and down the drains. So I immedietly assumed that there were little gnomes working at a rapid speed with knifes that sliced the pooh so quickly that it would safely go through the tubes.

Kim Wise

I believed that my pee was apple juice and I got that from my brothers.So I was thursty and I peed in a cup and drank it and my mom found out and grounded me and my brothers for 1 month.

Tyrone Starr

Once i was really afriad to wee and poo at the same time because i thought the combination would create a giant 50ft tall mutant creature that would destroy my town.well i just had to do both and i was afriad that in the sewers it would become godzilla...

anon

i used to think that if you ate poop youd never have to eat food because youd just keep poopi'n out the same peice a poop, dont worry i never tried it

mow

My brother used to believe that boys and girls had the same "private parts". At the same time I used to believe that boys NEVER touched their "thingy" when going to the bathroom; that would be gross. He was about 9 and I was 6. I would never wash my hands after I went to the bathroom because I never got them really dirty or anything and I didn't touch anything disgusting. My brother, however, had to use his hands to hold his penis and so he always washed his hands. He was disgusted with me. "Don't your hands ever get sticky?" he asked me. I was so confused. I thought he used some special type of toilet paper that was like Silly Putty that would be pink, strechy, and wet. o_0

I looked for the special toilet paper that day.

I used to believe that if I put my hands over my ears no-one could here me going to the toilet. I was 12 before I stopped putting my hands over my ears when I was on the toilet!

Pene Quin

I used to believe that I could choose to defecate through my penis. I was frightened that, one day, I might jokingly think to myself "now I will poo out of my penis", thereby causing this to actually occur. I think the belief was sparked by the event occuring in a dream. I was convinced that it had been a waking occurence.

Optional Excretor

i used to think that if you didn't go poo you would get fat, and that was why every time i saw an "obese" person i would yell "daddy!! they don't go poo enough!!! WHY?" i was dumb but i was cute....

coconut

my friend, she's african american, she believed that since your poo was brown that white people's poo was white

Anon

I'm a girl, and used to believe that I peed outta the Front hole, and pooped outta the middle hole. Then one day I discovered the back hole, and earlier that day I had heard the term "rip you another asshole" so, I thought someone had "ripped me another asshole"... I ran to my mom, and she told be otherwise(I was like 6)

meh

I used to believe that if u held your liquid in for too long, your bladder would explode, it wasnt until grade 4 that my teacher told me i didnt have to cry everytime i couldnt go to the bathroom during an assembly..-.-"

Jessie

When I was little, I believed that if I didn't go to the bathroom quick enough, I would actually explode.

Coco S.

I used to believe women would stop being potty-trained after a certain age because I saw all these commercials for 'diapers' (actually sanitary napkins).

Anon

when i was a kid, my grandma convinced me that she never needed to fart or take a crap, and that she peed very rarely, only once or twice a year. both me and my brother believed she must have been chubby due to all that crap she never took.

betterkeepthisoneasecret

I used to think that ladies urinated through a little tube that looked like a piece of string, which would hang down from their privates.

I later found out about tampons.

Anon

I told my little sister that if she squeezed too hard when doing a dump then her brains would come out of her bum. She had acute constipation for ages as a result...

gem

Being one who easily gets to the 'mad dash for the restroom' point when I find something really funny and one who just has to run to the restroom a lot in general, I was convinced that guys had a huge advantage in this department; I thought they could just kink their penises like lawn hoses, thereby stopping the flow until able to get to a restroom! Um, my first serious boyfriend in college kindly let me know the truth about this. I was like 19 or 20 at the time. Thanks, Matt!

MAC

When I was little, my Mom took to the docor for a check up. During the physical, the Dr. handed me a cup and said, "Go behind that curtain and make some water in this cup for me." Dumbfounded, I went behind the curtain and looked around for chemicals or something I might try to mix to make water. After about 5 minutes my Mom came to see what was the problem and explained what the Dr. really wanted.

Leo

I used to wonder why people were fat; after all, everything you ate eventually would go down the toilet, right?

Karen