weeing and pooing

I once belived that anything liquid that you ate, such as soup or a drink, would become crap, and all other food would become urine.

Anon

On the subject of pee, I thought that given that girls lacked the male plumbing, that they therefore peed out of their bums ...

Bryan

I used to think girls pee'd out their butts.

Kurt

When I was 4 or so, I believed that a monster was waiting at the end of the hall (obviously, to kill me). Well, the bathroom was at the end of the hall as well. So I usually stood there, peering down the hall for a few minutes before deciding to do my business elsewhere (behind the couch, in my pants, etc). That didn't go over to well with my parents.

Kate

my dad used to tell me when pooing that if u pushed too hard ur guts will fall out

Anon

I used to think that little tiny workers were in my hind-end, and the would chop up the poo and shove it out.

Nick

I used to believe that women urinated from their butts, because they sat down to pee.

Kurt

I used to believe that my poo was chocolate cookies for the toilet to eat, and the my urine was warmed lemonade. YUK!

dumbkid

When I was little I used to believe that if you pee'd in the
road you would get a sty in your eye! To this day when
somone gets a sty I asked them if they pee'd in the road.. I get alot of wierd looks lol

Aleah

When I was about 4 I saw a man in a wheelchair and thought that everyone should just be lazy and should have a wheelchair with a potty in it. I also thought that everyone should give me a pound coin so I could be rich and I thought it was mean of them not to!

genie

I used to believe that if you stayed on the toilet for too long, a monster's hand would grab your bottom and drag you down to where it lived.

good ol' days

Whenever my family and I went on roadtrips and someone had to go to the bathroom, we would stop at the nearest gas station. My mom would then take me into the handicapped stall, and more often than not, the toilet was clogged or spattered with poo/pee toilet water. For the longest time, I thought that all handicapped people always had dierhea.

gas station child

I used to believe that Winnie the Pooh was a turd. My Mother used to read the books to me and I was not exposed to the Disney version of the stories when I was young. I guess I must have confused "Pooh" with "poo".

Adam

when i would sometimes walk by the toilet when my grandad was coming out, i would catch a whiff of the stink he'd left. therefore i obviously decided in my 5-year old mind that only adult males had to shit.

mig

Me and my friends used to think that if you sat in a place where a man had peed, you would turn into a homosexual.

Francisco

When I was a kid I thought girls' urine was blue (I am obviously male).

Dave

When I was younger I was convinced that girls peed from their backside, purely from the reason that they had to sit down to do it.

D

I used to think that in side your tummy there were little sectioned off spots where all of the food would go. I thought there was a section for greens, meat, liquids, and it all was pushed to the butt to make you pee or shit.

Krista

It was actually not until I was pretty well grown up that I first encountered the phrase "to take a dump" meaning to poop. For a while I didn't know what was meant. I thought the phrase would mean like falling out of one's chair, or falling off a bicycle or a sled, etc. I finally was corrected in a moment when I was made to feel stupid when the phrase was used and I responded as if it meant someone had fallen onto the floor. Since then I've tried to make a joke of this whole awkward learning experience. Like once recently at a Christmas exhibition, I sat down at the eating area and found I was sitting in a very rickety chair. On inspection I found the chair seemed to be about to fall apart. So I hung a sign on it reading, "Caution. Chair broken. Sitting not recommended. You might take a dump." I hoped someone might find it riotously funny, but I never observed any consequences.

Pam

I used t believe that my poop was a little family living insie my butt and they would push their children out of my butthole. I called them the Poo Poo People

Poo Poo Person