weeing and pooing

I used to believe that tampons were the greatest invention on earth, as it allowed women to pee without going to the bathroom.

Thats what I get for being a guy.

Anon

When I was little, I was wondering how girls peed, so I asked my mom, and she told me that girls peed out of their butts. I believed this for a few years, until I was 8, when I was at a female friend's house, and I said something that revealed this belief. She told me that this was false, and although she wasn't at all scornful, I was horribly embarrassed. Later that day, I asked my mom about it, and she said that girls pee out of their vaginas.

This, of course, is also false.

I learned the truth from internet porn when I was 12.

Anon

I grew up in Tennessee. The first out-of-state trip I remember being taken on as a child was to Virginia, where I got diarrhea. For what seemed like the longest time thereafter, I thought that meant that people in different states pooped differently, the more solid poop I was used to being the kind peoiple did in Tennessee and the diarrhea-like type being what people in Virginia did. I never questioned that until one scary day when I got diarrhea back home in Tennessee.

Felicia

When I was a child I asked my mum why poo and wee were called poo and wee. She said that they weren't the actual names, they were just what my brother and I called them. I took this to me that we had invented the words ourselves and they had spread to worldwide usage. I was very proud of us!

Caroline

I used to believe that if girl pee and boy pee got mixed together it would create a baby! I was always sure to flush so my brother wouldn't pee after me. I didn't want any babies to be down in the sewer.

DJ

i used to believe that my body had two pipes running from my mouth, one down to me front bottom & the other to me back bottom [as i would call them! ] So when i'd choke on my food & my mum would say that its gone down the wrong hole i would really think that i would poo from me front bottom or wee from me back bottom! I remember being so confused & dissapointed when this never happened!

emma

I first encountered the word "rectum" in connection with having a thermometer put in there. That convinced me that I had a special hole there, specifically dseigned for having my temperature measured. That was clear to me for quite some time while I still only vaguely realized that poopoo somehow happened in that same general vicinity, without being at all sure that it came out exactly where the thermometer went in. Later when I became clear exactly where my doodoo comes out, I learned the word "anus" in association with that. Realizing eventually that the same hole is involved with both, I thought the two words were function-specific: that it was my anus for purposes of pooping but my rectum for purposes of temperature measurement. Later when I learned of a creation vs. evolution controversy, part of the foucs I thought of when contempleting it was as a question of whether God made my rectum as a a special place just to put a thermometer, or whether my anus evolved as a hole where I could doodoo. Guess it was more comfortable at the time, when thinking of any creator God, to think of him as an enabler of temperature-taking rather than as an enabler of crap-taking.

Lydia

When i was younger my mum told me that the reason old ladies have fat ankles is because they don't go to toilet straight away when they need to and that the wee needs to go somewhere so it travels down to your ankles!!

princesstallulah

When I was a kid and we would be out camping or in the woods, if I had to go to the bathroom, my grandfather would tell me I needed to use a 'pee tree'. Not knowing how to identify a pee tree I would go from tree to tree asking "Is this a pee tree?" until he finally told me I had found the right one, and got a good laugh of course.

pee tree

i used to believe that a guys penis was on a reel and inorder to pee they had to unroll it and roll it back up when they were done

the queen of france

A boyfriend I used to have told me about something he believed when he was little. He went with his parents to the Walter Reed Medical Museum in Washington, DC. There were a lot of body parts in jars.

He knew most of the parts, like the lung or the leg. He asked his mother about the contents of a particular jar. "That's what makes you pee."

So for years he thought that a bladder in a jar in Washington, D.C. was a kind of central controller that determined when everyone in the United States had to urinate. I guess it would make sense, so not everyone would rush to the toilet at the same time.

JoAnne

When I was a schoolgirl, the teacher always would ask if someone needed "to be excused" as a way of asking if anyone needed to go to the bathroom. I got used to the phrase as meaning that. Then one day I caused quite a laugh on the playground when the teacher saw I was having some sort of difficulty and asked wahat was wrong. I replied, "I stepped in a place where a dog got excused."

Kimberly

My little sister used ot believe that someone' urine always came out their favorite color. We only discovered this when my mother asked who didn't flush the toilet and my sister ran in, took and look and declared that it was her because it was her color.

Anon

I used to think "dung" was a type of chocolate (thank you, neopets). One time I went camping, and I REALLY had to poop, so I ran into a forest and...yeah, and it was kinda embarrasing so I smushed it with a stick.

20 minutes later, my cousins [from england] and I decided to take a walk in the forest. My oldest cousin shouts, "Watch out! Don't step in that dung!"
I thought he meant don't step in it or it won't be ok to eat. I was so proud of myself! I created chocolate by pooping! So instead of stepping in it, I picked it up and took a bite...and then barfed all over the place 10 minutes later.

Dung is not tasty!

When I was younger, I used to think that people with different colored skin had different color poops.

Samuel

I used to believe that everybody had different colored pee. Mine was yellow. My brother told me his pee was green. And when I went over to my grandmother's house, her toilet water was blue, so Ithought that was her pee.

Why'd I get stuck with yellow pee?! I wished I had black pee.That would have been so cool!

Kino Lee

When i was young I used to believe that when your bladder was full you could eat dry foods (like crackers, chips, or bread) and it would absorb all of your pee so you wouldn't have to use the bathroom any more.

Anon

i used to think that your butt cheeks is where your poop was stored.

Anon

When my brother was little, for whatever reason he ha an aversion to pooping. After a few days my mom became concerned and told him "Tyler, I know you need to poop"

To which my brother replied "NO I DONT I HAVE A CROUTON IN MY BOTTOM"

To this day I dont know exactly what he meant by that but he's 25 now and we still don't let him forget that.

Rachel

When I was 4 or 5 I thought there were little elves inside my body that helped me poop. It was like a little factory and each one would turn a crank or something to move things along. I think I watched too much Fraggle Rock.

Anon