people

When I was 6 my parents bought me a polo neck jumper in a plastic bag, which carried the warning "Danger, may cause suffocation to small children." I was amazed by my parents' lack of care in buying me such a dangerous item of clothing and congratulated myself that my ability to read had saved me. I was always sure to hold my breath whenever I put the jumper on.

Em

when i was about 5 my mom wanted to blow-dry my hair after my bath one evening. i was really stubborn and i wouldn't let her so she told me that people who go to bed with wet hair die. immediately, i let her dry my hair. i had a hard time going to sleep that night because of what she told me so i felt my hair just to make sure i was safe. i had 1 tiny spot of moisture in my hair and i thought i was going to die. i spent the next 20-30 minutes sobbing and saying good-night to everything in my room until my parents came in and my mom admitted to telling my a lie.

idiot kid

I lived near a graveyard when I was young, and on some of the gravestones it just said R.I.P. I just read it as the word 'RIP', and so I thought that this meant they were killed by Jack the Ripper. When my nana died, her headstone had R.I.P on it. My parents hadn't told me she'd died of cancer, and I began yelling, 'But why would Jack the Ripper kill Nana?'

Esme

for a long time i believed that R.I.P. meant really important person. i was confused when i couldn't recognize the names on the graves that said r.i.p.

marty

When my mother first explained murder to me I didn't understand.
I already knew what to kill something meant, but when I asked my mother what the word "murder" meant she used the term "To take someone's life,"
I instantly thought that meant that murderers would kill people, take the insides out of their bodies, put their skin on like clothes and pretend to be them. Thus "taking" someone's life.
I was a little cautious around some people after that just in case they had been "murdered".

jack diddly squat

I used to beleive that the grease spots on our driveway directly under my bedroom window, were the squished remains of the previous tenants children, who had leaned over and fallen out of the window.

Teri

After thinking about it hard, my sister, aged about 6, asked, "Mummy, if people die standing up, can they use them again in shop windows?"

Alex

I used to believe that there where dead people in the bases of bouncy castles.

Anon

Until I was about 12 years old or so, I thought Heaven was on the Moon. My grandfather had died when I was young and whenever I asked Granny where he was, she would point to the Moon. Needless to say, seeing Neil Armstrong step foot on "Heaven" was disconcerting.

Marty

When I was 5 I was really into Bruce Lee. I asked my dad how he died as clear the man was invicable. My Dad said that Bruce Lee was at a ceremony to meet the Queen and saluted, knocking himself on the forehead and killing himself outright. Needless to say, martial arts was obviously a dangerous skill to have. Not long after, I saw the Queen on TV laughing. I thought she was heartless, didn't she realise the part she'd played in the death of Bruce Lee?!?!

Barnaby

when i was little, i used to write letters to my grandmother who passed away. i tied the letters to a balloon
and let it fly away.

balloons

I was convinced that we each had a certain amount of air to breathe. This was contained in an invisible balloon. When it ran out you died...I would lie in bed and hold my breath for as long as I could. I am now 62 and my balloon is sagging badly

jim webster

When I was a kid and the other children on the playground would point their fingers at each other and say "Put your hands up or I'll shoot!", I never understood that this was to stop people from doing anything suspicious with their hands. I thought it was physically impossible for someone to die from a gun if they didn't have their hands up. So when people threatened to shoot only if they DIDN'T put their hands up, I thought this was a cunning trick to make them put their arms up so they COULD shoot them. You'd think eventually people would catch on and just keep their hands down, they can't die then!

Evilrabbit

Up until I was 14 (and I'm only 15 now!!), I used to believe that a widow was someone who had lost their husband and a widower was someone who had killed a husband. This was clarified for me one day when my mom and I met an older couple. "How nice, the widow and the widower" My mom said after they left. I freaked out yelling about why hadn't they put him in jail.

Samantha

When I was younger (perhaps 3, maybe?) I used to believe when a human died (I always imagined one of my sunday school teachers)they would go to heaven. God would put them in a suit (like a bunny suit, or a cat suit) and they would be reborn as that animal. I would always look through my cats' fur to see if I could find the zipper on their suit.

I would also ask my cats what it was like to be an adult... I never got a response. But I SWEAR I heard my Siamese say "Hello, James!" the other day.

Prince of elves

When I was in Grade 6, I prayed every night... "please don't spontaneously combust, please don't spontaneously combust"

Rebecca

when I was a little child, I used to believe that lifeinsurance made sure that if I died, a new me would come to live with my mum and dad. nice lifeinsurance, don't you think!?

Live from Norway

When I was little, I heard my parents talk about SIDS where babies died. So I thought if you named a baby "Sid", he would die. I told a kid in my class named Sid that he should ask his parents to change his name because he could die any moment

superxam

When I learned that poet Slyvia Plath had killed herself by sticking her head into her oven I used to wonder how she could have done it. It seemed such a painful, drawn-out way to die. Of course, that's because I thought it was an electric oven (the only kind I'd ever used) as opposed to a gas oven.

k.e

My friend once told me that when people die, their bodies are buried on the street as speed bumps. Every time I drove my bike over a street bump, I'd wonder who was buried there...

nicole