i used to believe

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when i was younger my sister and her friends would tease me all the time and make up things that i would believe. one was that my cousin dana wouldn't drink orange juice unless it was out of a shotglass because she hated drinking it any other way. i never questioned why but i figured thats how she did it. i honestly believed this until i was probably eleven when i said to my sister "well she only drinks it out of shot glasses you know that" she looked at me and laughed and told me that they had made it up.

Anon
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when i was really little and one of my cousins told me that i was twins with this girl i had never met because she died or my parents sent her away or something like that. i believed them. the really strange thing is that this girl looked nothing like me and is about 15 years older than i am. i have no memory of this but my mom swears it happened.

Anon
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top belief!

I used to hit golf balls out into the field behind my house when I was about 4. I hit a ball so hard once that when me and my dad went out to look for it he secretly picked it up and threw it in the air, called my name and said look, and then proceeded to catch the golf ball. I believed that I had hit the ball so hard that it stayed in the air for the full 5 minuets.

When I went to tell my mother she called me stupid. =(

Brady
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When I was younger, I asked my Mom why black folks were so much better at sports than white folks, as it seemed like professional sports were dominated by African-Americans. She told me that God gave them an extra muscle, hoping that it would make up for some of the hardships they'd faced in this country. During Black History Month, I shared this fact with my 1st grade class, and my teacher quickly tried to change the subject. Unfortunately, the class was waaaaayyyyy too curious about this evolution in the human condition, and the discussion was promptly ended. When I told my Mom about how my teacher seemed to not agree with this information, she called her sister and started angrily quizzing her about the information she'd gotten from her. Apparently, my aunt thought it was hilarious that something she'd told my Mom when she was a little girl had stuck for so long that it was almost passed down another generation. I learned a lot about a lot from that one event.

Anon
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When I was younger, my older sister was a tyrant who always got in trouble. When things went awry or if I got hurt, my parents would often ask, "Did she do that?", probably gesturing to my older sister. I hadn't a firm grasp on pronouns at that point, so for the longest time I thought my sister's name was "She" and would talk to her or about her referring to her as such. We didn't put it all together until years later, why I would call my sister "She", rather than her given name.

Victor
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When I was little, my grandmother always said "those who sing before breakfast will cry before evening". I believed that this was true for years, until I learned that it was my grandmother`s way of assuring herself of quiet mornings when I visited.

Daria
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My mom's family lives in Florida and we live in KY. Growing up my family would make the family trip to Florida every year. She would always say," We are going to Florida" and we would always stay with my aunt donna once there. For the longest time, I thought that my aunt donna's name was actually Aunt Florida. No one ever correct me, they thought it was hilarious. Still to this day, I sometimes want to call her Aunt Florida instead of Aunt Donna

Anon
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For some reason, when I was two years old, I was absolutely convinced my grandfather was in The Rolling Stones. Now, they weren't really popular at the time, as it was the early 90s, so I have no clue how I even knew about them, but I could not be deterred. even though he told me several times he was a retired insurance agent, I figured that was just his cover.

Kat
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So my mum has just had my baby sister. Right. Now, have you ever seen the cliché story in like, EVERY kid's TV show with the whole, "Now my parents have a baby they won't care about me any more"? Yeah, I kinda thought you had to do that(you can see where this is going). Cue me crying in Reception (age of 4, about 1st Grade to all you Yanks) at my school.


Thanks alot, Tweenies.

They Might Be Giants
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When I was a kid I had a toy plastic Gumby. My Dad always pretended he was going to eat him and eventually I stopped believing him. Well once he told me he ate him and I told him I know he didn't and he opened his mouth and I saw green stuff smeared all over his teeth. I burst out crying and didn't stop for 30 minutes! He had smeared a green crayon all over his teeth.

Josh
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When I was really young my 16-year old sister used to tell me she could shrink me to the size of an ant anytime she wanted and that she would then step on me and that she had a brother once before who she did it to. I was terrified and tried to think of ways I would survive if I was ever shrunk that small.

Josh
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When I was a kid, for some reason, my evil Satan's child brother took it upon himself to teach me my colors. Red was red - apples were red, and so on and so forth. However, he told me that "green" was orange and "orange" was green (and I never quite figured out why oranges weren't called greens.) In first grade, my teacher asked us to do a color-by-numbers picture, and kept me in at recess because I'd done it wrong. Finally, she figured it out and said, "Betty... Can you get me a green crayon?" I still to this day confuse green and orange.

In therapy
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When i was younger i used to believe that my real mom was locked up in a closest, and that the "mom" i had was a secret agent trying to brainwash me and my brother because she was too mean to be a real mom.

Anon
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when I was younger I was convinced my mother had eyes in the back of her head, and could even see through walls. Once I was in the living room, which can't really be seen from the kitchen, and I decided to test it out. I was practicing my fake karate moves, which I thought I was excellent at, and I called out to her to see if she knew what I was doing. She yelled back that I was doing karate, and I was absolutely shocked. I didn't mess with her from then on, because she obviously had killer X-ray vision.

Steph
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When I was a little girl I truly believed that my father had magic powers and could control the traffic lights because whenever we were in town and stopped at a light he would waggle his fingers and say "Annnnnnnd you're green!" Viola! The light would change and off we'd go. For the longest time I thought my dad had this awesome ability to control the lights.

Mi
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When I was young I thought that grownups spoke a different language to each other when they were alone, and possibly one learns this language in big-boy school.

Matt
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I used to believe that my mom had eyes everywhere, one time some kids beat me up on the courts and when I got home she knew.....It was just one little fight but she got scared and said I was moving with my aunty and uncle in bel air.....

Will
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When i was 5 years old i used to think that family time meant that you were timed when you were with your family.

Billy Bob Joe
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A young lady called Sue once told me that when she was a little girl, she believed that grown-ups couldn't run - for the obvious reason that she had never seen any of them running. One day, she gave cheek to her father, then ran away, supremely confident that he would never be able to run after her. That was the day she was disabused of that delusion.

Malcolm
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When I was younger before I could read, my mom would consult the "Mother's Book"- a dictionary in our house for any information concerning raising kids. It went something like this, "Mom, Can I stay up until 10pm?" "Well, I'll consult the Mother's Book. I'm sorry, it says right here that you can't stay up until 10pm on a school night." It wasn't until I was older and could read that I realized that it was a regular book.

Anon
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