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at 3 , I used to believe that you could decide if you would rather be a mom , grandma , dad , uncle , aunt, etc. etc. and I always insisted on being a mom , my grandma just couldn't understand what I was trying to tell her.
When i was younger my grandfather was my world and i beleived he was always right. I was at the age where i was learning colours and my papa told me that black was white and white was black. My mom tried to correct me but being the tender age of three i believe that noone with gray hair could lie. Till this day i still think i mix them up sometimes
shannon
When I was very small I thought my parents were aliens, and when I went to school they would come out of their human skin.
Cassandra
top belief!
Whenever my mom would use the phrase "I'm not telling you again..." I thought it meant she was giving up and I had won.
toon
At Christmas, we would always have big family get togethers. I remember when I was about 4 years old, listening to my Mother making plans for 'Boxing Day' and having visions of my Dad and my Uncle John squaring up in the ring...
Steve Creek
top belief!
I used to believe that an aunt twice removed meant that she had married into the family, then gotten divorced and then married someone else and gotten divorced again (removed from the family twice, ya know?)
Katie
This is probably a case of paranoia. When I lived with my very religious aunt & uncle in Blaine, WA USA, during my senior year -I was 17- I believed that they were monitoring my drug & alcohol use (I was doing that stuff very rarely). One way was by having some sort of device built into the toilet plumbing that would take a sample of my urine and send a signal to their bedroom and tell them if I was on anything (maybe even monitor pregnancy!). ...paranoia?
Another way was by collecting hair samples from my brush and the floor, and sending it to a lab. They were pretty wealthy, so they could afford that sort of thing!! (They shoulda been more worried about their own teens.)
(alcoholics) ANONYMOUS
My grandad used to make jokes about how his stubble was the "hedgehog", my other grandads short, bristly beard was the "broom" and great-grandads long white beard was the "mop".
A few years ago i asked my parents and it turned out my great-grandad didnt have a beard.
I guess it was such a good joke...
Da Gal Wit Braces
My college roommate was the middle child in a huge Irish Catholic family of 11 children. One time she was asked to take care of whichever child was the current baby. The baby fell off the bed and was knocked out.
My roomate was terrified that she'd killed the baby, so she hid the baby under the bed. She figured her mom had so many children that she'd never notice the missing baby.
Fortunately, the baby was fine, and woke up squalling. So my roommate was convinced she had the power to bring the dead to life again.
rita's roommate
top belief!
When I was five, my uncle told me he had a wooden leg. When I tried to touch it to feel if it was really made out of wood, he used to say "don't, or you'll get a splinter". He also told me that my other uncle had a wooden head, but not to say anything, because he liked to pretend he had a normal head.
Sam
When I was 11 and my sister was 7 we told me brother, who was 5 at the time, that he was born a girl but that Mommy and Daddy wanted a boy SO much that they just decided that they would tell him he was a boy. He asked why Mommy didn't just have another baby and we told him that he hurt Mommy so bad when he came out that she couldn't have anymore kids. When he asked why he had a penis we told him that's what all girls have and since he was our "sister" we couldn't show our privates to him cause you can only show them to people that aren't your family. It took quite a few hours of convincing but finally he believed it and confronted my parents with the "lies" they had told him. Needless to say me and my sister were in BIG trouble. My brother is now 21 and to get his goat we still call him "Patricia Michelle" his "real" girl name (his name is Patrick Michael).
snufflekitty
top belief!
For years I was believed that my dad was 49, that he didnt change his age every birthday.
I was gutted when I found out he was only 38!!
silly me
i used to think my parents put small microphones in my clothes, so they could hear what mischief i was getting up to. i suppose you could call it a micro conspiracy theory
glow
top belief!
When my cousin Michael had misbehaved, my mother said that his mother would whip him. I thought this meant that she would put him in a bowl and use an eggbeater on him.
C.C.
When we were small children we had an aunt that was extremely overweight. At some point we came to the conclusion that you eat so much, you get fat and then you blow up and pop like a balloon. The aunt is still alive.
Lori
When i was 4 i thought that all the grownups where robots
Nomad
Someone once told me that everyone was related to everyone else, so I used to think that if enough royalty died, my father would be made king and I'd be a princess. Only I didn't want that to happen, because I knew that, whatever my relations to royalty, they were very, *very* distant.
I was so sure that the number of children in a family told you exactly how many times their parents had shared an intimate moment!
Lisa
I thought grown ups were born grown ups.
mea
top belief!
i used to believe that everyone had a twin on the other side of the world.
tahnee
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