family

I used to believe I had 2 sets of parents. The nice ones and the mean ones. They would hide in their closet and switch out occasionally.

Matthew

When I was very young, I used to think an "unfit mother" was literally "unfit" physically. My mom would take me out shopping, and I'd get extremely upset when I'd see an overweight woman out with her children. I just couldn't understand why the police would take her children away just because she was "unfit." It made me so sad, and I remember being glad my own mom was thin.

Gretchen

I used to think my family was really a family of bears from another planet who wore people disguises to fool me. I swore that I had to take naps during the day so they could have their secret bear meetings and take off their suits for a while. The low muffled voices through my closed bedroom door was my 'proof'.

Anon

When I was very young I was sitting at the table with my grandmother and I asked her "Why do you and grandpa have such wrinkly faces." At the time I thought she was being serious when she calmly replied. "From yelling at kids."

Sammy

My brother is 8 years older than I am, so I was kinda young when he was going through his growth spurts. I remember being worried that he wouldn't stop growing, but instead would grow too big for the house.

Anon

my mum told me if i showered late at night my bones would melt. i never did believe her. but deep inside, i have always been scared.

TheCapeCrusader

I was absolutely convinced that I was adopted, and that my 'parents' were not my true biological ones. One day I even hunted around my parent's bedroom, and to my dismay found my birth certificate, with their names on it! I remember being so disappointed, and seriously considered whether they had put a fake one there, to throw me off the trail!

FreeAndIndependent

I used to believe that my sister was not human, but infact an angel. Her shoulder blades indicated where her wings used to be. She told me that they were cut off by my parents. However, she could still travel up to the heavens by wrapping herself in curtains and spinning. I was terrified of losing her.

She was 4 years older than me- so I believed every work.

Sajib

I used to believe that everyone only had Uncle Bills and Aunt Sues. My mother had a brother named Bill and a sister named Sue - and Sue happened to marry a man named Bill. My father had a sister named Sue as well. So I had two uncle Bills and two aunt Sues. When a friend told me he had an Uncle Pete (or some such non-Bill name,) I didn't believe him, because ALL uncles are "Uncle Bill."

Mark

my dad's name is donald and when i was little i used to tell everyone that my dad was Ronald McDonald. and every time i was with some one and i would see a statue of him i would tell them that was my dad.

jessica

when i was little i was convinced my parents were trying to poison me, so every time they put a drink on the table for me and my brother i would take the one with less in cos i thought it would be the one with no poison. i have no idea why i thought this!

mishka

When I was little, my mom used to leave me at my friend's house. My friend had trouble sharing and got into trouble a lot. I thought that if she was bad enough, her mom would give her to my mom so that we could eat her.

Joanna

I used to believe that if your parents grounded you they would actually pound you into the ground, so one day my mother told my sister she was grounded and I cried because I didn't want my sister to be in the ground for a week

Courtney

I used to think that a baby shower was when the mommy took a shower with her new baby son/daughter, and everyone came to watch.

me

I used to believe that my mum will give me an older brother.

I'm the only child in my family. And I really hoped to have an elder brother to take care of me. So when I was very small, I asked my mum to bear me an elder brother. After hearing my wish, my mum was very surprised and she said, honey, I can't bear you an elder brother because you are our first child and even if I bear another baby, it will be younger than you!
I felt very depressed. But after deeply thought, I got an idea. I told my mum that she can first eat me, and bear me an elder brother, then she can bear me again, then I would be the younger one. :P

Daisy

I used to believe that your parents asked people to be your grandparents once you were born, the same way they people were asked to be your godparents.

Daniel

When we'd leave for our family vacation, the song "Up Up and Away" would coincidentally always play on the radio. My parents made me believe it was a sign we were going to have a good trip. I guess I never noticed the 8 track player.

Anon

When I was little, my dad told me that I used to have a brother, but he got sucked up by a vacuum cleaner! I was scared of vacuum cleaners for years...

Jumanji

I used to believe my dad that "sacre bleu" meant sacred cheese.. until I was 17.

Gregg

I was three years old when JFK was assassinated. Though I don’t remember it, I knew it made an impression on me.

My uncle Joe was about 15 years older than me and he lived at my grandmother's house. Joe was kind of a wild fella back then, always getting into trouble. He also had hunting rifles in the house. I was afraid of the guns, but was fascinated with the big scope attached to one of them.

Once when I was five or six I got up the courage to look through that scope. I was totally amazed and intrigued with the crosshairs that I saw superimposed on what I looked at through the scope.

Some time after that I was reading through a book my parents had about the Kennedy assassination. To my absolute horror, the book contained (what I later realized was) a photographic re-enactment of the shooting as seen by the assassin. The picture showed a limousine from behind, with people in it and a man I knew was supposed to be Kennedy. The photo was shot through a scope like my uncle’s, and the crosshairs were aimed directly at the back of Kennedy’s head.

In my young mind, I could only draw one conclusion: My cousin Joe had killed President Kennedy.

'duardo