family

When I was about 5 years old, I used to think that I swim very well. My father said that I was a successful swimmer. After many years, I saw my childhood photo and I realized I wasn' t swimming too good. Actually, I was swimming on the shore of the sea.

Oya

When I was about ten, my mother told me that my great-great grandmother's name had been Lois.

For some reason, I thought that meant my great-great grandmother was Lois Lane, and was impressed that someone I was related to had dated Superman.

Anon

I grew up in a Russian immigrant family and I was used to hearing my father's name in Russian, which with English letters would be "Seroja". Also, my father owned and worked at a signs store named "Signs, Signs, Signs". Every time I was at his office with him, which was pretty often, he would answer the phone "Signs, Signs, Signs". So one day he brought a friend over and so I asked his name and my dad's friend said "I have the same name as your dad. Do you know your dad's name?" And I said, "Of course! It's Seroja." So he replied, "And what is it in English?" So of course I said... "It's Signs Signs Signs!"

Lana

My brothers to piss me off sometimes told me I was adopted, and that I was the housekeeper's kid.

ricolarno

My cousins (who were older than us) told me and my other cousins that we were all born in China, but we fell in a well and fell all the way to our parents houses and that they adopted us. I thought that was true for several years.

Emily

I used to believe (and still do somewhere deep down!) that I was born an identical twin and that my twin is out there somewhere. I even theorised that maybe i was a twin but that the twin died in early pregnancy!! It was such a strong feeling that even now at 18 i still feel it and i occasionally bug my mom to ask if she ever had my twin and never told me!! (her answer is always no but i dont always believer her depending on what kind of day ive had and how stubborn i want to be!!) Ive finally settled on the idea its cause im a gemini and that they say geminis go through life looking for the yin to their yang only to find it within themselves. ive had to settle with this to save me from the looney bin but who knows maybe my identical twin is out their somewhere...........

FunkyCherry

When I was younger my mother and father used to tell me that if you were bad in a way, they would send you to the "BAD GIRLS HOME" whih was like a boarding schoolfor "bad girls". Weel, one day my sisiter was no where to be found and I asked my dad where she was. He told me she was sent to the bad girls home and she won't be back for another day. That night I saw her come home and asked her
" How was the bad girls home?"
She gave me a puzzled look on her face and no answer. I asked her
" Howwas it like?".
Still no answer.
I thought shewas shocked beyiong belief and never asked her again. For 7 years I pondered "Where is the Bad Girls Home?" I always assumed that it was located in the oil tanks near my home. It turns out that she was just over my grandfather's house, which explains the look she gave me, but not where the Bad Girls Home really is.....

Spooky

When I was about 8 years old, I was a flower girl at my parents' wedding which was held in our front yard. Until I was about 16 years old, I thought that they were renewing their vows. That was when my Mom told me that for the first 8 years of my life, my they weren't married!

You mean I'm a b*stard?

When my parents came home with my new sister, my father said if she cried at night he'd give her away. (I believed this) I slept under her crib for 3 years to prevent him from doing so!

anomoly

Until I was in maybe 7th grade, I thought Paul McCartney was my real father. I also thought that my "fake" parents were holding him hostage in my attic.

MCA

When i was in kindergarten, my mum told me my nan was a pirate because of the way she cut cheese crooked. i took that literally and told my class for show and tell that my nan was a pirate and so i would grow up to be a pirate and steal everyone's treasure.. the teacher then made me sit down..

Doblica W.

When i was a little toddler i used to belive that U had to pick whether u wanted to be a kid or a mommy or a grandma... I used to cry deciding wotch one....

Jess

I used to believe that my dad was the guy on those Brawny paper towles. Now i look back and i realize that the only thing in common is that they both have a mustache. They dont look alike AT ALL

Steph

When I was little my mother was prone to rather outlandish threats. She would tell me that if I didn't stop she'd break off my arm and beat me over the head with it. I still remember looking in the mirror with my arm crooked over my head to see how you did that. Well that and I would run look in the mirror, because she also said she could see a lie written all over my face.

Anon

About 2 years ago, when we owned a cat and it behaved badly, my mom would warn it and shout "I'm gonna return you back to the pet shop!" So my 6 year old brother made these big eyes, looked up at my mom and asked in a low voice, "If I don't behave, will you take me back to the Kid Shop?" And my mom assured him of that and to this day, he still believes another kid will take his place if he misbehaves.

Mary

When my mom was pregnant with my little sister I thought that if she was a boy than I would have to become a boy too. I prayed for a little sister.

Anon

When I was little, my older sister told me there was this "Brother & Sister Trading Center" where she would trade me in if I behaved badly.

k

When I was about 8 or so, I remember my dad watching those court shows with real cases. I came to the conclusion that ALL parents had to pay child support. So one day, my dad was saying out loud some of the bills he had to pay. I then asked "What about child support?" He looked at me confused, and said "What?" I was too embarrassed to say it again, so I just walked away.

~Melissa~

i used to believe that my father was a monkey from mars and that everytime i got him mad he would take me to mars and yell
"Look here! Looka t all of this non-life!"
and then bring me home by telephone.

Maritan

When I was 4 my parents told me my baby sister was coming the next summer. Shortly after I started having the dream that I dropped my sister in a witches brew and my parents disowned me. Back then I thought dreams told the future so when she was born I refused to hold her because I was afraid I would be disowned. I refused to even go into the kitchen till I was 6 if she was in there.

crazy-lizzy