family

I used to be afraid that if I did something bad and blamed it on someone else, my mother would read my thoughts and punish me. Whenever I would blame my older brother for something (eating the last of the cookies, etc.), I would be frightened for weeks that mom would read my thoughts and come punish me.

Kelsey

When I was little my father was very mean to me, but only in front of my family; no one else.
So I thought this was normal and that all fathers were this mean. I would be over at a friend's house and see my friend sit on her father's lap or hug him or he might give her a kiss or whatever and I would think, "She's pretty nice to be so easygoing with her dad" as I figured that as soon as I was out of earshot he would be insulting her and hitting her.

(I don't speak to him anymore)

Carrie

when i was really little and one of my cousins told me that i was twins with this girl i had never met because she died or my parents sent her away or something like that. i believed them. the really strange thing is that this girl looked nothing like me and is about 15 years older than i am. i have no memory of this but my mom swears it happened.

Anon

When I was 6 my father told me that women were actually creatures imported from another planet to serve men. I believed it until I was about 10.

Ted Collins

when I was little my mom drove a van, and I thought it was my school bus because I had an older brother and sister... so every time she stopped she had to act like she opened the door and kids would get on, I sat in the back of the van because I thought it was where the 'cool kids' sat.. just like my older brother and sister.

Terri Lynn

It never occurred to me when I was little that my parents would try to protect me or watch out for me. I thought they took me places without considering whether kids were allowed there, and I thought that if for some reason I got in trouble when out with my parents, the powers that be would punish me directly without appealing to my parents first.

Anon

I noticed a book once in our house and the author had the same first and last name as my dad, and I thought that my dad had written a book.

Lucy

whe i was 5 my mother said if i did't behave she would ship me over to a new familly, for about 3yrs or so i really thought you could send kids by UPS i was afraid of the man w/ the brown outfit??

?????

In kindergarten, I had 2 friends who were sisters. One of them was about a year older than the other. They looked a lot like each other and always were the same clothes, so I assumed they were twins :D Later on, my own sister told me what twins really were.

irinarici

I believed that my Mum and Dad got divorced because he snored too loudly.
It was a long while before i found out that it wasn't my mums bed he snored too loudly in.

Floss

My mom used to get me to behave by threatening to sell me 'to the gypsies'. After hearing this a few times, I thought I was the wise one and replied, 'oh yeah, how much did they give you for me then?' Well, she must have been pretty mad at me that time - she replied '$2.75' - and I freaked, truly believing she'd gone at sold me away.

la gitane

When I was little I was afraid of my 6'3 uncle not only because of his height, but because I though his handlebar moustache would come off on me.....I was afraid of his wife, my Aunt, because I thought her freckles would come off on me, too.
And thanks to my mother, to this day I cannot sleep if a closet door is open, it doesn't have to be just the one in my bedroom, but any closet door in the house.

heather...

I used to have a dream where my auntie would offer a Ferro Rocha and she would chew it up and stick it out on her tongue.

I was so scared every time my auntie came round I hid from her.I have realised she is a great auntie.

Charlie

When I was two and three I was completely convinced that I had a brother. I told everyone everything that my brother said and did. He was the coolest brother ever and we had sooo much fun together. One problem, I was an only child. One day I told my mom that I was pregnant so I could have a baby for her so I could finally be with my brother. The people at preschool asked my parents why my brother didn't come with me. I still didn't have a brother.
When my mom picked me up from school I'd say "Wait! We forgot something! We forgot my brother!" and my mom would say "Where do I go to get him?" and I'd say "Make a right at the light."
She of course went left and we went home without my brother.
I took 20 years of trying for my parents so after another four my mom eventually gave up. She didn't tell anyone though. The next day the phone rang and someone she worked with called and said they were taking care of a child that needed a home.
We set up a meeting and I met my brother for the first time. I was like "finally!!"
The preschool teachers were kind of confused about how I didn't have a brother but then suddenly did.
I was on top of the world though and I didn't have to give birth!

Joelle

i used to think my parents could read my mind so i wouldnt think dirty thoughts

Jon Thomas

I used to believe that every time my parents would go out of the house, just to like get the paper or something, i would think that they were running for the car to leave me here forever. Now I beg them to leave so I can have some alone time!

Elizabeth

When I was young, I would frequently throw fits. My mom would always count to three when I did- when she got to three, if I was still throwing a fit, I'd get a spanking. Well, being the mischevious little thing that I was, every time she got to two, I would hollar at the top of my lungs "BUCKLE MY SHOE!" It was only for a little while that I beleived she was actually trying to say 'one, two, buckle my shoe.' After that, I did it just for kicks.

Anon

when I was about 4, my parents would tell me that children are brought by some big birds,so every time I had a fight with my brother, I would ask my mother to call that bird to come and take him back!!..

fina

When I was five, I convinced myself that my brother and my parents were really aliens, and one day they would take their masks off and try to eat me.

Anon

I'm an identical twin - I was born six minutes before my brother... which made me the older brother. I use to make him hold my hand when we crossed the street - because I was the older brother - and he listend!

Eric