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One of my best friends up to this day, still can't say turqoise. She says tork-horse instead, but she's convinced it's the right way.
top belief!
My parents, in an attempt to stimulate my creative impulses, gave me a few boxes full of "stuff" to play with - dress-up clothes, fabric, ribbons, art supplies, interesting toys, beads, you name it. One fabric bit that I had was purple with silver metallic stripes on it. I had seen a TV show recently featuring circus acrobats and thought I'd make myself a skirt with that fabric so I could be an acrobat for Halloween. However, I did not yet know the word for "acrobat". I taught myself how to sew (BADLY) and made an truly awful tiny little miniskirt a week or so later. I ventured into the livingroom to show my parents and visiting grandmother and aunt. My mom, without thinking, said "You look like a prostitute!" She then realized that she probably should not talk about sex workers around her young daughter and would not tell me what it meant. I, therefore, rationalized that "prostitute" was the word for acrobat and went around school the next day telling people - *including my first-grade teacher* - that I wanted to be a prostitute for Halloween!
top belief!
Until about 2 days ago I thought the saying 'with every fiber of my BEING' was . With every fiber of my BEAN.' I never understood how beans could have fibers, even if they could why would it matter to someone if I used every one, plus I don't have a bean. Was the bean a metaphore? I was a very confused child
top belief!
I was about 10 years old and I used to belive that 'rape' was simply ripping peoples clothes. Imagine the shock for my teacher when for an exercise in English I wrote the sentence "The dog raped the postman". I thought I was being extremely clever.
For a brief period of about one month i believed the more u talked the shorter your life would be and that if you answered questions with as few words as possible you'd live longer!
I had a German boyfriend whose sister used to pronounce "W" as "v" and "v" as "w". They lived in West Vancouver and she'd always say "Vest Wan". It surprised me that she didn't pronouce Volkswagen as "Wolksvagen".
My Teacher asked if I could Name types of beans so I stood up in class and said Baked Beans, Runner Beans and Human Beans!
top belief!
When my brother was very young, he would pronounce "hamburger" as "hangerber". This became a standard alternate pronunciation in our family. At about 8 years old, while having dinner at a friend's house, I called them "hangerbers" and everyone laughed. I was surprised at their ignorance, and spent a good long time convincing them that "you can say it either way".
top belief!
When we were younger and went on walks my sister always used to get the binoculars wrong. She used to ask my mum to pass her "big nockers" over so she could have a look out of them.
My friend told me she had invented the expression 'Gordon Bennett' and I believed her!
I never understood the abbreviation for White anglo-saxon Protestant (WASP) so as a teenager I thought these initials stood for "Women Absent of Sexual Preference"!!
when i was about 6, my mum told me a joke. it was 'how many letters are in the alphabet.....25 because the angel said no L ' i never used to get it so i used to go around saying 'cos the angel took away the g'
I used to think a church choir (I pronounced it 'chore') and a church 'quire' were two different words for the same thing.
When I was little, I said "Hachy-bachy" instead of hibachi (those little outdoor grills.) So everyone started calling them that, and we even called propane grills "Hachy bachy" as well. When I was about 22, my father sent me to Sears to price "Hachy bachys." The guy at Sears looked at me like I was complete moron, and I at last discovered that there was no such thing as a "Hachy Bachy."
I recall as a child hearing grown-ups speak of someone who was going to get a pinchin'. They seemed pleased about this. I silently wondered how anyone could be happy about receiving anything as painful as a 'pinchin'! Only later did I learn they spoke of a pension!
I used to believe that when my Mum said "Heaven Only Knows", that she was actually on about some guy called "Hevveroni". I always wanted to meet him....
top belief!
My parents, whenever on a family holiday would say "oh! what a picturesque lookout" (however would pronounce the word 'picture-skew' the way it looks like it should be said). It wasn't until I was 18 when I said picture-skew that my boyfriend at the time pointed out that I had been made a fool of!Darn Parents
My brother thought that if men were perverts, women must be pervettes. My sister and I were accused of this often.
When I was in primary school, I always wondered why we had to give the teacher a "round of the floors" after assembly. I mean, why on earth would a teacher want a circle of linolum?
It wasn't until many years later I dicovered the word "applause"....
My Dad would always say 'well cut my sock'if I or any other family members told him anything interesting or remarkable. I was 25 when I realised his favourite expression was actually a spoonerism for 'suck my cock'. Oh the long lost innocence of youth.
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