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I once wrote a birthday card to my mum. I decided to put a rhyme in it - but the only thing i could think that rhymed with "birthday".... was "gay". but that was brilliant cos that meant happy...right?
Happy Birthday Mum.
I think you are very gay.
Got some strange looks, i did.
I used to believe that "digest" meant "dissect". I once asked a guy, "Have you ever digested a frog?". He replied, "You try doing it!"
I used to think Casserole was a suit case that roled. My mom once made casserole for dinner and asked where the suitcases were. I saw a backpack and started to role it...i thought it was like an activity we were gonna play for dinner...everyone laughed at me. we had people over too
I used to think the 'okay sign' -- when you put your thumb and middle finger together and stick the rest of your fingers up -- was actually a 'monocle sign' and meant that you lost your monocle or something like that. I only wish I could tell you what made me believe this.
I used to think that "string him up" meant that you took someone high up on a tree and used string to tie them to it.
Sometimes when my parents were trying to get me out of bed or to get me to do something when I'd just been sitting around, they would say, "Up an' at 'em." For many years I heard this as "Up an' Adam." Adam was my older brother's name, so I thought my parents had made that expression up to tell me I should be more energetic like my brother. I didn't figure out what they were really saying till I was a teenager.
I used to believe people said "Happy New Year with Leaves" instead of "Happy New Years Eve." My family still reminds me of it over 30 years later. Every year.
i used to think that bounty hunters hunted bounty paper towels, so i always imagined some guy with a gun shooting big rolls of paper towels. i believed that tell was in 4th grade
I used to think that every word meant something; I once asked my sister what “purple” meant, and she just said, “It doesn’t mean anything; it’s just the name of a colour.” On a similar note, I also thought that a word was a short form of saying whatever the definition was. Almost like the definition was the word in another language. Like, I thought that a single word could take the place of a small phrase. A random example would be this: saying “pop” was actually like saying the much longer phrase, “a fizzy, carbonated drink that comes in a variety of flavours.” I would be like, “wow, ‘pop’ means ALL that?” I hope this makes sense. I tried describing my thoughts as best I could.
As a kid every time I heard a person say "it's about time" I always replied "so what about it?"
I used to believe that L-M-N-O-P was one letter, pronounced ellamenopee, because they say it fast in the alphabet song.
I used to think allegations were made by alligators.
My mum told my and my twin brother Weasal, that she could not read our comics to us, as she couldn't read the speech bubbles.
I went years think my poor mother had some rare form of dyslexia, when she just couldn't to bother to do the voices!
i used to believe that random people would win a pulit-surprize.
My cousin used to climb under the electric fence without hesitation and she would yell over to me "Come on, what is the matter-- are you a-scared?"
I said "Ascared?" She just shrugged and went about her buisness. I finally figured out that if you were A-Fraid then you must be A-scared in her little 8 year old mind. I still think about it and it cracks me up!
In fifth grade, I asked my teacher what the word "ambition" means. I must have pronounced it incorrectly, or she was trying to lead me into figuring it out myself, because she asked me where I had heard it. Quoting the Dolly Parton song, "9 to 5", I replied, "like 'cup of ambition'" ("pour myself a cup of ambition"). She looked perplexed and didn't define the word for me. I don't think she listened to country music.
In elementary school, my neighbor told me that "several" meant seven. So if she said she had several Barbies, it meant she had seven of them.
She was also the one who told me that only women whose husbands have died could use the title Ms. instead of Mrs. or Miss. This is how people knew if you were widowed or not.
I believed her until I mentioned it to one of my teachers.
For a brief period of about one month i believed the more u talked the shorter your life would be and that if you answered questions with as few words as possible you'd live longer!
One of my best friends up to this day, still can't say turqoise. She says tork-horse instead, but she's convinced it's the right way.
I am an older sister and took great pleasure teasing my younger sister. I told her you had to be 16 before you could be sarcastic (a bit like buying alcohol). She reached 16 and asked if she was old enough yet. I said she had to wait until she was 18 and she very nearly did - Sorry sis.
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