appearance

When I was a kid and my mom would tell me "don't talk to strangers..",I never really knew what a "stranger" was. To me, 'strangers' were tall, skinny men wearing capes, with giant needles on their head...who would stab you to death, with these needles, if you talked to them.

nomi

I used to think if you dressed like the popular people uyou would be popular. So one day I wore an outfit that the most popular girl in school had worn a day before. I walked up to her and said,"Hi. I don't no if you noticed but im wearing the same outfit as you did yesterday," She said"Yeah but I found out yesterday that that outfit was worn my a teacher earlier in the year!" i asked the teacher if I could call my mom for a change of clothes!

Mystery

I used to think that a little man made shoes.

damien91

When I was little my father would always yell at my mother and tell her she was fat, and make her cry. He told her a fat wife was grounds for divorce. If we ever snacked or ate cookies, he would say "Be careful, you don't want to get fat".

Until I was in my 30's and looking at my friend's wedding albums, I honestly thought only thin people got married.

Are you kidding?

Mom used to tease me when I was younger, because I was such a "fuzzy" child. She told me stories that I was born with a tail like a monkey, and that they had to cut holes out of my diapers to let my tail out, until finally they had the tail surgically removed.

I hated those stories.

atleastididntjumpoffbuildings

I'm not sure how old I was but when I was pretty little my sister showed me a joke where you push your hands up against your face and say something like "Hi! I'm chubby. My whole family's chubby..." and some other things but I loved the damn joke so much I went around saying it for the rest of the week until my dad said that if I did that to my face anymore then it would stick like that!! And I believed him for a long time.

Sam

One day when i was probably about 3...my mom found me in the bathroom upstairs with lip "smick" all over my face and hand soap in my hair...my mom tried to keep from laughing and asked me..."kelly, why did you put lip stick all over your face and soap in your hair?" I answered "Cause there was "spiders" in my hair!"
I'm kinda guessing that my dad called tangles "spiders"
haha

Kel

When I was like 3, my father and I were in the store and there was this african american guy standing in front of us in line. And he was totally buff.
Well, according to my dad, I had never really seen that many african americans in my 3 years. So when the man started talking, I said very loudly, "LOOK DADDY, THE MONKEY IS TALKING!!!"

Aveda

I used to think that it was illegal for black people to marry white people.

russian

When I was very very young,obviously before I had ever been to the beach or anything,I thought that only the parts you could see on black people were black--the rest,white. What a dumb little kid!

Michael

I saw this thing on TV, and I don't know where it was from, but there were a few people in it who had their faces blurred to keep their identities private. I freaked out when I saw this, because I thought they didn't have faces!

Anon

Ok, my brother had glasses since he was four years old. Without them, he was nearly blind. His glasses had plastic lenses that were always getting scratched up when he crashed into stuff. My parents always told us to be nice to him because he had so many problems.

One day, my dad told me to never to hit someone who was wearing glasses. This piece of wisdom made sense to me because my little brother had enough problems as it was; he didn't need someone beating the hell out of him on top of his already significant issues. I mean, you wouldn't go around kicking the tar out of people in wheelchairs would you?

I always assumed that the lenses in glasses were made of plastic. I worked in the navy as a guy that ordered glasses for my squadron, all of those lenses were plastic so I assumed that ALL lenses were plastic.

Years later, my wife had purchased glasses with actual glass lenses in them. Right after she got them, she ran into a wall and almost broke her glasses.

I remember saying, "Wow, that could have been dangerous. If the lenses actually broke, you could have gotten the broken glass in your EYES!"

Two realizations hit me at once...

1. You don't hit people that wear glasses because the glass shards might get in their eyes. Duh.

2. They are called "glass"es for a REASON!

I was 27 years old at the time.

Frank Emsley

When I was about six years old I took a One-a-Day vitamin from my grandmother's medicine cabinet believing that I would grow large muscles and become extremely healthy. The entire day I kept going into the bathroom to look in the mirror to see how much my muscles had grown. I believed this would happen because of the commercial One-a-Day had on TV.

John

i used to believe that onlyout front has clothes, until one day when i looked into the mirror, i saw my back and said:"wow, i have clothes on my back too"

Muce

I believed that my dad and his best buddy were hawk-eye and his pal from mash... also at another stage I thought they were the layland brothers ( a show on Australian tv)

Amanda Roa

One time when me and my cousin were about 3 years old we got realllyyy bored and wonderded up to my mom's bathroom and watched her put on her make-up. Later that day while all the grown-ups were downstairs we recalled our previous observation. Being only 3 with not much to do we decided to destroy the "evil" make-up because it was "taking over" our mother's face. Of course nobody was paying attention and we continued up the stairs and opened up her drawer filled to the rim with overly exspensive make-up (at least $200 of new make-up). we removed the entire drawer of all it's contents and plunked it into a nearby toilet one-by-one giggling rewardingly as we did so. Soon we heard the conserned voices of our parents calling, "where did the kids go!?!" Faster we dumped the wrathful-facepaints into the toilet. Soon our parents appeared in the door with a relieved expression, which had quickly altered as they saw our awful motives. They screamed in horror as we flushed down the make-up as fast as we could. We thought that the make-up had possessed our parents; as they pulled us from the toliet. We tried to tell them that the make-up was evil, and it had already started to take over their body...They just yelled at us and put us to bed...

Stinky 1 and Stinky 2

I used to believe that all twins were identical. It’s not that strange a belief, especially that I did find out a long time ago that there are also non-identical twins. But - I have aunts who are twins and I always just presumed they were identical, and then I met my fiancés aunts who are also twins and again I thought they were identical. About 2 weeks ago my sister told me that my aunts are not identical. I was so amazed and so mentioned it to my fiancé and he then mentioned that his aunts are not identical! (He said ‘did it not give it away they look nothing alike?!’) I’m now 27 so spent all those years believing my own aunts who look nothing alike were identical (and about 5 years thinking his aunts were identical)! It goes to show that those childhood beliefs don’t really let go!

Claire

In a store one day, I pointed to a very attractive black woman and said "Look at that man!". Not having seen many African Americans in my 2 years, I wrongly assumed every black person was male.

Anon

Im not racist at all, I was just never introduced to diversity until I got older but I Honestly thought the boogie man was a black man dressed up in all black with a stocking cap on that only came out at night.

White Girl

I Used To Belive That If You Were Pretty, You Were A Princess. So One Day My Dad Told Me I Was A Princess (He's Teases Us All The Time. He Was Born On April Fools Day). And I Thought Suddenly, My House Turned Into A Castle. So At The End Of That Day, I Asked "Daddy, Am I Really A Princess?" He Told Me No And I Cried Myself To Sleep That Night.

Robyn