characters

When I was little, there's was a carved portrait of St. Martin de Porres on a particular wall in my room. I used to think that the guy in the carved portrait was actually what God looked like. So, to me, God was a black man wearing white robes. However, I had a kid's Bible of the white Jesus variety (to those who still don't know: Jesus was a Middle Eastern man, what with being a Palestinian Jew and all) so I thought Jesus and all other characters from the Bible were actually legitimately pink people with funny noses. Thus, the Holy Trinity: black God, pink Jesus, and a white dove for the Holy Spirit.

Anon

I used to believe that God, Jesus and Santa were the same person. I was really happy when my parents told me that Santa didn't exist, because I thought I wouldn't have to go to church anymore.

Anon

When my mom got angry, she would say
"Jesus Wept" I always thought she was saying "Jesus Swept" (the floor). I never understood how someone as important as Jesus had to such menial work!

Jim Galloway

When I was little and was sent to my room, I used to imagine that God used to tell me off in my room, the funny thing was that he looked like inspector gadget without legs (he floated near my window).

Anon

when i was younger i used to think that if you dialed 666-6666 the devil would pick up and that would mean you wanted to die. my friend and i dialed it once on a dare.. We got so frightened when we heard the operator that we screamed and hung up. I cryed for an hour straight. " i kept yelling he is coming to get me mom" my mom thought i was crazy. later on in life i found out it was the taxi number lol oops

ashley

When I was about 4 my family went on a vecation to spain. At the hotel resort we staied at there was a bartender named Jesus.
I always mixed God and Jesus up, so when I got back home I told all my frinds that God lives in spain and works in a bar.

Magnus

I believed that god was something that surrounded the earth, like a shell, and when we sent up the space shuttle or a rocket or anything like that, it made a hole in god, and I always wondered if it hurt god when we did that

bob

My best friend and I met secretly to dig a hole in between our yards. We were convinced that we could dig down to where Satan lived and tell him that he was stupid and he would stop being mean.

About 2 or 3 feet in to digging the hole, a thunderstorm came, and at the first strike of lightning, we were convinced he was trying to get us so we ran home and didn't go near the hole for weeks.

K

I always heard people say that "God is inside you all the time". So when my tummy growled and made a that springy noise, I used to think it was God on a pogo-stick.

Anon

I used to believe that Jesus and all of the wise men lived under my bed.

wuteve

For a long time after I had the Sunday school lesson on "God formed Adam from the dust of the earth" I thought parents made their babies out of dirt and the color of the dirt used was how skin color was determined

Elijah

My sister thought there was a character in the bible called Baby Beezus and continued to think this until the age of 22.

Vicky

My Dad used to always say "Born in a barn" if I left the door open. I believed this to be true and told all my friends I had been born in a barn like Jesus.

Z

I used to believe that God looked exactly like the picture of Abraham Lincoln on an American penny.

Leah

I used to believe that God resembled George Washington - specifically, the actor playing George Washington in a car dealership's President's Day sale.

Josh in L.A.

I knew that Jesus died on a cross, and I concluded that this must have made
him rather cross. I also imagined the cross as a bed of nails leaning against
a wall, holding up a scowling Jesus.

Paul S.

When I was a little girl, my parents told me that God could see and hear everything. From then on, I had this picture of God as a giant man who was completely covered in eyes - even the bottoms of his feet.

muddgirl

WHen i was little, I thought God looked exactly like the fairy godmother from cinderalla!

dandi

I was never religious, but I had a very Christian friend in first or second grade. We were sitting on the floor one day, watching a class video, and she was telling me how she was very upset because she'd been to church on Sunday and found out during the sermon that baby Jesus had gotten a splinter in his foot. So, for a long time, I pictured Heaven as having hardwood floors...

Anon

I used to believe that God and Father Christmas were one and the same. When I was about 5, my siblings broke it to me that Father Christmas wasn't real. I think mum was farly shocked when I refused to go to church because God didn't exist.

That one took a while to clear up.

Anon