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After watching the movie " The Exorcist", I thought that the devil could come through the Television and try to get me. I slept with the bible for a week!!
I was raised Protestant and was always scared of those ladies in black and white. I thought they were called "Numbs". That belief went on for quite awhile!
I used to believe that groundhogs day was the day that the devil came up to earth through a hole in the ground. I would have nightmares about him visiting me as a shadow on my wall. Fortunately the dreams ended after a nice man walked out of the shadow and we became friends.
My first exposure to the concept of God was when my parents informed me of a big, all-powerful Dog (God backwards, get it?) that lived in the sky. I believed this for a little while, at least.
When I first started school I thought that Jesus was a tortoise. Because every morning before the Lords Prayer, the Headmistress would ask us to say the "Prayer that Jesus taught us".
I was with my mother in the early sixties, and we saw two nuns walking on the sidewalk. These were the first nuns I'd seen in real life, and I was very excited. My mother explained to me that," You always see them in pairs. This is because they're afraid if one goes out alone, she'll surely run away."
I had tinnitus as a child and used to believe that it was the sound that the devil made when he was closeby
I used to think that the disciples spoke King James English (think "thee" and "thou"). That was how they talked in the Bible, after all.
When I was about 7 or 8, I went to Williamsburg, Virginia for the first time. When we went to the church, I thought the tour guide said "I will be your God" not guide because I wasn't used to the Southern accent. This confused me very much!
I was convinced that God looked like the Wizard of Oz...you know, the big scary greenish face? No wonder why I didn't like going to church! :o)
When i was around 4 or 5 I thought that God's name was Peter and God was his second name... i misheard "thanks be to God" as "Thanks Peter God"
When I was younger I thought God lived up in the clouds, so whenever I was in an airplane I would look for Him.
I always pictured God as a very nice benign and smiling spider in the sky.
He was drawn like a stick figure daddy longlegs and his body was a sky blue circle with a smile on it.
When I was a kid...I'm not even sure how old I was, but I was always forced to go to sunday school where they would teach us, 'God is everywhere.'
My mind couldn't decide that God was a big head watching us from the clouds, or a bunch of invisible doll-sized Jesus's stacked up against eachother, filling the whole of the universe. Don't ask me. I don't know.
When I was 4 or so I believed that the Holy Ghost was really a ghost. Every night I had this kind of vision of a door opening, leading to steps going down and the Holy Ghost, looking like one of the white sheet variety, would come floating up the steps
I used to have a picture book that showed Jesus dying on a cross. I had heard that we had to die like that because we deserved it. I didn't hear that Jesus died for that punishment so I assumed that when we died we had to die on a cross!
At my school there was a music teacher that came every tuesday and taught this girl how to play the tuba when ever he would come he had on all white and strappy sandals and had long hair it took me and my friends forever to learn that it wasn't jesus
My CCD teacher always talked about "letting Jesus into the room in your heart". My parents never really raised me Catholic, and I never really thought religiously, so I would go home wondering about rooms in my heart, which I never thought about as this wondrous emotional thing, more as a mass of beating organ...and how it was furnished and the fact that there was a door on my heart, and why the hell Jesus was allowed in there??? I didn't tell him he could go in....
I used to picture God as a giant transparent poodle after seeing "All dogs go to heaven".
I used to think that Jesus was burried in our local grave yard because there was a statue of him on one of the graves.
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