church

At Catholic mass, during the receiving of holy communion, my mom had explained that the body of Christ was being given out to eveyone to make them more holy. My younger brother always believed that the reason people were chewing communion was because it had skin on it.

KJS

I went to a church and I lived in a city called Holly and when i looked at the bibles in the church they would say Holy bible I thought they were talking about a "Holly Bible" and that they had a Bible for Holly.

Beverly

I used to believe that my pastor and his family lived inside our church. I was very jealous of his kids because the had such big bedrooms and got to play with all the toys.

Lindsay

I used to think that the offerings in church were teleported directly up to heaven; I pictured the gold offering plates floating up into the sky.

Brooke

I used to believe that nuns had to hold in their pee for penance. I wasn't even brought up religiously, so who knows where the idea of penance even came in.

Anon

when i was little i thought that jesus only died for me and no one else and that is why i was there, because i almost died when i was born, and i thought that he died to save me

Anon

I thought that all tithe money was put into a small room and God came down and took the money to heaven with him. They always said it was "God's money" then they would take up collection and then walk it out of the main sanctuary. I thought that if I could just hide in that room then I would be able to see God.

Amanda

When I was 8 and having my first communion, my mom put a white veil on me and I protested, saying "But this is for marrying. I'm not getting married."
Mom said "You're marrying God." Now I realize she just mean that this would make me closer to god but at the time it sounded awful. I got so upset and started crying saying "I don't wanna marry God." I thought that first communion meant you really actually married God, and you never got to fall in love with anyone else.

A troubled romantic

When I was very little I used to believe that if I stood by the statues in the church they would come alive and give me a piece of coltsfoot rock. I Still have no idea where this came from but I remember feeling annoyed when I never got any rock.

Angela

That you start out Catholic and after you reach a certain age you then become Protestant.

Anon

when the Priest in my church used to say something about praying "as our lord tortoise"... i thought that God had the ability to change into a tortoise or something

Anon

In my Catholic church, when the priest holds up the bread in wine, bells ring. So I always thought that was god calling us. Then when i became an altar server I found out the truth, that we ring the bells.

You know whats sad? I became an altar server in 6th grade.

Ashley

when I was little I used to think that the frankincense smell in a catholic church was from old people wetting themselves on the carpet.

Rebecca

Being a non-Catholic, I used to believe that the word virgin was another word for Catholic: My third grade friends, however, had recently learned what virgin really meant and were afirming that they were indeed still virgins. I'll never forget their faces when I declared, "I'm not a virgin."

Katie, CA

Before I learned that the word "brethren" means "brothers", I associated it with the word "breath". I had heard of a church called "Church Of The Brethren" (not a church I had ever attended). I though it must be a church that particularly emphasized the belief that our breath is the spirit of God within us.

Wendy

When I was in preschool, I used to believe that the baptism tank in my church was a mini-swimming pool. When we would have to go up and sing at Christmas time, I always wanted to go jump into the mini-swimming pool instead of sing Christmas carols. My mom finally told me that it was a baptism tank, not a swimming pool. It still kinda bums me out to this day, and i'm 18.

Keeley

As a lover of animals, one time in church I was quite excited by the sermon because my mis-understanding of the minister who I swore said 'Gladly, the cross-eyed bear'

Philip

When I was a child, my friend told me that God can change me from a girl to a boy. I resented God for this and to this day I have rejected any belief in Christianity.

Alicia

When I was younger I thought that you had to be Italian to be Catholic because all the Catholic people I knew were Italian.

Anon

I used to think that at communion time at church, the priest performed magic and made the Eucharist appear out of nowhere. I believed this for a long time until I saw them in bowls in the back before church started.

Sarah