prayers

When I was a little girl I had many warts on my fingers. I was so embarassed by them. I remember being in church one Sunday and praying to God to take my warts away. The next thing I heard was "Our Father who has warts in heaven.." And from that day on I was so proud that I had warts just like God!

Beth

when you light the menorah during hannukah, there's a saying that you're supposed to recite and it's in hebrew. used to think the end of it said: "Miss Evon knew Lahadlick Nair, shall Hannukah"

Anon

When I was really little, I thought that the Lord's Prayer went, "Our father, you aren't in heaven...give us this day, our daily bed...the Father, the Son, and the Bully Spirit..." I still laugh at that one!!!

Mandy Grrrl

When I was little, I heard the commandment "Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's house". At the time, I was under the impression that a "neighbor" was only limited to next door. Imagine my surprise when my next-door neighbors had their house bug-bombed and it had a large cloth cover over it -- I thought the commandment said "Thou shalt not COVER thy neighbor's house"!

Bunny

When my brother-in-law was young, he thought the priest was saying: "Dominic, go frisk 'em" instead of Dominus Vobiscum.

Linda

When my daughter was learning her prayers in parochial school, her homework was to practice reciting them. I was in stitiches when she spoke of the "Holy Spearmint", "Jesus, Mary, and Jophesine" (her grandmother's name is Josephine and she pronounced that backwards too!), and "Hail Mary, full of...full of...Mom, what's she full of?"

Susan

I'll never forget the day I learned that the correct wording in the prayer was "and let perpetual light shine upon them". For years I'd been asking God to "let the petrol light shine upon them".

Susan

I was taught to pray as a 3-year-old, but I learned what the word "afasha" meant ... as in "Afasha die before I wake, I pray the Lord my soul to take."

Rote memorization isn't always the best method.

Jim

"Our father, who AREN'T in heaven."

Dead people went to heaven, but I figured maybe God lived some place even higher. But I still didn't understand the bad grammar.

Anon

We were praying for somebody close to us that was sick. My daughter (at the time 6yrs) proceeded with "Dear Lord, abra cadabra..." whereupon we collapsed into hysterics.

D

As a little girl I was brought up quite religious even to the point that in the month of October we all had to say the rosary every night, no matter what, but one night I was just too tired so I tried to sneak into bed when my mum shouted (get out of bed this minute and say your prayers even a cow gets down on its knees before sleeping).

bernadette

At infant school we said a prayer at the end of each day -

Hands together softly so
Little eyes shut tight
Father just before we go
Hear our prayer tonight.

And I used to say 'mother' instead of father because she was the one waiting for me at the gate not my 'dad'!

Anon

i used to believe that God was going to make me marry someone at school that i really didnt like and so u used to pray every time i decided i didnt like a boy "please dont make me fall in love with, or marry so-in-so when i grow up..nuts!

andrea

When I was about 8, our family were burying a much loved pet hamster in a small grave dug in the front garden. My Dad said thanks to God for poor departed Susie's life and we had a little prayer service. At the end of this service, my Dad placed the hamster into the grave with the words,

In the name of the Father
And of the Son
And into the hole you go
Amen

None of us were any the wiser.....

Mioauw

When I was a child, I had a little debbie oatmeal pie every day as I watched Sesame Street and Mister Rogers. After Mister Rogers, it was time for my nap. As I lay in my Aunt's bed trying to sleep I used to pray that Jesus would show himself to me so that I could REALLY believe in him. He never did, but I can still envision him the way I wanted to see him, standing at the foot of the bed.

Jay