teachers

Raised as an only child, I used big words for my age and usually got the meaning right. However in 1st grade, I came home and told my parents that I had a prostitute teacher that day! My parents didn't set me straight, when I reached 4th grade I'm sure they wish they had. I insulted their company in when I found out the woman was a "substitute", I refused to sit by her and asked my parents why they would lask a woman who sold her body, to dinner. I got set straight that night!!!

farmdog13

On my first day of school ( I was 5) I was introuduce to the principal who was named Mr Baker. I asked him if he baked pies for all the kids on the play ground. I was disapointed to learn that was just his name and there would be no pie.

Steve

When I was in 4th grade, I had the meanest teacher. ( I'm not going to write her name for I fear she will find out. I'm scared because i'm in 5th grade and she's still in my school.) She would always have the blinbs closed. Once this guy next to me told me that he thought she was a vampier. Soon I belived this too. I still belive, even though I know vampiers aren't real.

Anon

When I was in elementary school, I thought the manhole covers on the playground were where the teachers - who were also aliens - lived when the students went home.

Autumn

An elementary school nearby has a great big rock on the edge of the playground. The kids aren't allowed to climb on it, but of course everyone wants to, so some of the teachers call it "the poison rock," implying that if you touch it you will be poisoned. Other teachers refuse to go along with this ruse, so the kids all argue about whether the rock is poisonous, and they run and touch it if they're feeling really lucky...

playground designers should've consulted the teachers first

When I was in the special needs unit at my school in year 2 in 1996, there was also another girl in year 4 who always caused quite a bit of a stir-up and was always getting into trouble. Quite often when she did something wrong, the special needs teacher would say "I'll kill her!", and I was wondering where the gun was. I told my parents that this teacher was going to kill this girl, and they said that it was only sarcasm. I wouldn't think that she'd kill anyone now, she was a very lovely lady.

Tom

my teacher had no life other than teaching us kids

Katie M.

I used to think the janitor of my school was a serial killer . My friend believed the same thing and one day we went to his room to investigate. When we got there we heard chainsaw noises and we runned like out hell out of there.

paranoid

I remember in the 2nd grade, the other kids would go up to the teacher and ask her a question and go through a door at the back of the room, and stayed gone for a few minutes and come back. I had no idea what they were doing in there or for that matter what they were asking the teacher. Curiosity got the best of me, so, I got in line behind a kid to ask the teacher what was behind the door. At the last minute, I heard, or thought I had heard the kid ask, "May I go to the register room?" I had no idea what a "register room" was, but, being a curious 2nd grader, I asked the teacher if I could go to the "register room". Well, apparently the teacher didn't listen past "may I go..." so, she said yes. Elated, I went to the back of the room, finally I was going to get to see what was behind that door that all the kids wanted to go through. I opened the door, and all I saw was a sink, mirror, and a toilet. Well, I didn't need to use the "Rest Room", so, I just went in there, and thought, "Rest Room, that's what those kids were asking... Rest Room... May I go to the Rest Room, NOT the Register Room." Well, I felt pretty stupid, but, at least, now I knew...

Anon

Just last year (I was in 7th grade) my English teacher told me that she video taped all of her classes. I believed her, and was always super good in her class all year long. On awards day, I got the English award 'cause I was always on my best behavior in her class.

Madi

I used to think that school teachers are monsters, and they give you a lot of homeworks and projects. And if you don't do it, they take your guts and eat it.

billie

I had a gorgeous young kindergarten teacher who I absolutely adored. A couple times during the school year, she showed up not looking like her beautiful self and seemed kind of grouchy. I was always very suspicious of her on these days because I suspected that she might have been taken over by a nasty pod person. I realize now, with the benefit of age, that she was probably having a bad day and didn't put on make-up on that morning!

albertine

when i was little i used to believe that when you went to school you would stay there overnight and that the teachers would stay and watch you and i used to get scared. (wiered or what?)

teacher hater

I used to believe the teachers in my school were really robots who wanted to enslave us all to help them take over the universe, they got their information from a world satalight that was being controled by the king of aliens, he was pink (i hate pink) and his eyes popped out of his head wen ever he got mad.

renio and deady the evil teddy

I had a teacher in elementary school whose first name was Charm. I thought every teacher was named Charm but they all had different last names.

Desiree

I remember when I was in 1st grade we had a substitute teacher who informed the entire class in all seriousness that she had eyes in the back of her head. Not only that but EVERY teacher had eyes in the back of their head. As she walked around the room I remember despertaly trying to see her eye balls on the back and all I could see was hair. I figured if I couldn't see her eye balls then they couldn't see me.

Sarah