giving birth

I used to believe babies came out of mouths.

Hailey

When I was a VERY young child, I used to believe that babies breathed through their mothers' belly buttons when they were in the womb.

Then when I got a little older, I thought the imbilical cord was their air supply and they wore it on their faces like a fighter pilots mask.

Again when I got older, I thought babies could read their mothers' minds while in the womb.

Anon

My friend at about 8 years old used to believe that he wasn't born out the front, but actually came out his Mum's bum. His surname was Brown as well, so he might have actually been telling the truth!

Aberdeen, Scotland

I had the mechanics of childbirth figured out pretty early, but then a family friend had a "breech" baby. My mom explained that meant it came out backwards. I spent a long time thinking normal babies came out the front and breech babies came out the back.

K L

My mother when she told me that when pregnant with me she had a craving for mars bars so when I was born I was covered in mars bars. I told this to everyone at school till I was about 11.

Kirsty

One day when I was about four or five I asked my mom how babies got out of their mommies' bellies. Not knowing exactly what to say, she told me that they popped out of the mommy's belly button. I knew right away that this was total crap. But where did they get out? In answer to this question I decided that they had to be pooed out. Since I didn't know how babies where made either, I lived in fear of accidentally pooing a baby into the toilet.

cucumber

I used to believe babies were born with clothes on

Anon

My mom told me that I once asked her if we could buy a baby from a store. I was an only child and wanted a brother/sister.

Jill

This isn't mine, but my niece's. A while back, my sister and brother in law did that gender-reveal thing where they open a bag of balloons and the balloons were blue, meaning they were having a boy. My niece was devastated because she wanted a sister. But then she had an idea. When nobody was looking, she painted the balloons pink, thinking that would make the baby a girl. For months she continually insisted that the baby was a girl, throwing a tantrum whenever her parents would try to correct her. Even after the baby was born, she would call him Annie instead of Andy.

That was years ago. They're both in their teens now, and she still jokingly refers to him as her sister.

Donna

When my mom got pregnant with my (first) younger brother, I asked her how the baby was gonna get out of her stomach. She said 'God will make a door for him'. So I pictured a little trap door opening in her tummy. It didn't help the illusion much when she had to have a c-section.......and I saw the stitches from the 'door'.

Steph

o.k. up untill i was about 7 or 8 i believed that when a woman had a baby it came out of her mouth.....so whenever my mom yawned i thought she was opening up her mouth so she could have another baby and i ran into my room crying

stacey lol

I thought I had been given a pretty decent description of the birds and bees and childbirth as a child until I discovered at the age of 21 and the birth of my first child that the umbilical cord did not retract after being cut and was not a reusable part of our anatomy!

Debs

When my grandmother was pregnant with my uncle, a chicken flew into her window and crowed. This (according to my grandmother) is the reason why he was born with three toes on one foot. She said he was 'marked' by the chicken. Now I have my own daughter who at 2 months old began sticking her tongue out all the time. My mom says this is because I took her to a KISS concert when I was 7 months pregnant and she was 'marked' by Gene Simmons. Like mother, like daughter!!

Kelsey

I used to believe that when women wanted to have babies, their heads would be cut open and the baby would come out through it and then they would be stiched back up. i just didn't want to believe the real way.

kt

When I was about 6 or 7, I still had a vague idea that babies came from their mommy's tummy, but I had no clue as to how they got there in the first place, or how they got out. Then I saw a TV program that showed footage of a cat giving birth. I went to my Mom and proudly announced that I now knew how babies are born. Curious (and nervous), she asked me how. I proudly announced with a big smile that "the mother POOPS them out!" Well, she laughed so hard she almost s--t a brick herself, and when she finally calmed down, she carefully and gently explained the concept of there being more than one orifice in the female body....

Anon

i used to think if a woman pressed her belly button she would have a baby! then once i pressed my moms belly button and nothing happened so i said 'Mommy youre broken!' then i started crying!

AND i used to think until i was 12 that babys came out the back!

LOL

Most kids are told that the baby comes from mommy's tummy. Well, I took that literally and thought that babies were barfed up when they were born. It made perfect sense to me since I threw up when my tummy was upset - I figured if a baby was in your tummy your tummy would get upset and you'd barf the baby up . I couldn't wrap my head around how a baby could fit out of a persons mouth and thought maybe their jaws came unhinged, like a snake, and that they couldn't breath while they were doing it. I was born with a big ol' bump on my head that they removed a few months after I was born. I believed thoroughly that the bump was due to hitting my mom's teeth on the way out. Turns out if was just forceps.

Ashlee B.

My mom had a cesarean section when she gave birth to me and my siblings, so I thought all babies were born by the doctors slicing open the mother's stomach and taking out the baby. Strangely, this didn't really frighten me.

Anon

Growing up it was my mom, dad, my younger sister and I. At some point I remember asking my mom if she had my sister and our dad had me. I knew there was a difference between boys and girls so it made sense that boys gave birth to boys, and girls gave birth to girls.

John

When i was 5 I witnessed the birth of my dog's puppies and asked my mom where babies came from and how they got out of their mommies. She told me they came out like when you go for a poo. I was horrified that no-one had told me this before, think of all the poos I had flushed away without checking for babies!! From then on I always checked for babies after going to the loo, up until about the age of 12.

Jane