reproduction

A teacher I know told me this one: she had a female student who never heard that women could produce milk and nurse babies. When the student put two-and-two together and finally understood, she blurted out, dumbfounded "LIKE COWS???"

The kicker (and I'm not lying here) -- she teaches pre-med students in COLLEGE!

Lady Jane

I used to believe you ordered babies from Montgomery Ward catalog. My best friend's mother had a baby, so our family went over to see them. While there, I asked my mother if she would order us a baby from the catalog. I couldn't understand why everyone was laughing at me.

Anon

When I was little I used to believe that my daddy gave my mom a cookie that he made to look exactly like me. And then my mommy ate the cookie and I became a baby in her stomach. And then she pooped me out and I was born.

cookie

When i was younger i used to think that i was a boy and then my mum sta me down and said to me that a baby was born out of the gooseberry bush and i wasn't until i started secondary school i realised!.......

Embarresed yr 9

When I was young I used to believe that you could buy a baby from a catalogue. They always showed the babies in the coaches you could buy but I wanted the BABIES. I used to beg my mom to buy one. Instead of telling me you couldn't buy babies she just said, "I have enough with you and your brother!"

Theresa

When I was about 7, I met a blonde woman who had a redheaded baby. After she left, I exclaimed to my mom that she must of stolen the baby. When my mom asked me why, I told her because the baby had red hair and the woman didn't. Therefore, in my mind there was no way that baby belonged to that woman. My mom tried to explain that children don't always have the same hair color as their parents. Which to an extent I believed because I was blonde and my mom a brunette but because redheads were so rare to me, I just "knew" that only two redheads could make a baby with red hair. I refused to believe otherwise.

Anon

When I was little, I told my mom that I wanted to have 5 children and that they would all be boys. She then told me that it wasn't up to me because men determined the gender of the baby. And that was all she said, she didn't explain any of the logic behind it. So for the longest time, I thought that meant that men got to choose if they wanted a boy or a girl. In my mind I worked it out like this: When the woman was only a few months pregnant, the father-to-be would put his hand on her pregnant belly and say whether he wanted a son or daughter and that's what they would have. I guess I figured that involved some kind of magic. I didn't figure out otherwise until I was 10.

Jenny

Once when I was still in kindergarten, I used to believe that in order for women to have babies, they would have to pray to God and ask for a baby boy. Somehow or another, the baby grows up rapidly into a grown man. Then, somehow or another, the woman will get pregnant after this took place.

Lisa

As a kid I didn't know anything like "SEX" exsisted. I used believe if a girl falls in love with a boy or they get married,the girl becomes pregnant. Later when I got to know sex exsisted, I believed the guy would just put his thing into girls and lay still and had no idea for how long!

poosh

i used to believe that you could determine the gender of you baby by the position your where in during sex.
example:
-women on top = a girl
-man on top = a boy

Silly me ;-)!!!!

Nana06

When I was little, my brother told me that babies were made by a man peeing inside a woman, therefor, my skin was made from my father's pee. There was nothing more disgusting than thinking you were made of pee. It took me a long time to get over that one!

Lia

I always wondered how it was decided if you would come out a boy or girl. When I was younger I believe that whichever parent wanted a kid more, than the baby would come out their sex. I'm a girl, so I obviously thought my mom wanted to have me more than my dad.

-e.corinna

When I was a kid, around five or six, I found out that men and women somehow had sex and somehow it involved boy parts and girl parts. (I didn't know any specifics!) When I heard that the man puts his penis in the woman and fertilizes an egg, I thought for sure that my two testicles were two fully formed little human embryos just waiting to get squeezed into a woman and grow into kids.

This explained a lot of things for me, like why you didn't ever want to be kicked in the nuts. I thought it might even kill the little guys. I also thought that since I had two testicles, I could only have two kids. And men like my uncle, who had six kids, must have at some time had more.

Now that I'm a parent, I find it odd that I have two children, just like I always knew I would.

Rich (just found out the truth)

My mom used to tell me never to kiss before you are married. I had read somewhere about a baby being formed by sperm and egg. I also thought that babies lived in the stomach. So, when I was about 7, I pieced it all together. The sperm travels to the egg from the father's mouth into the mother's stomach when they kiss and then the baby grows there. Then, a couple years later I wondered why the stomach acid didn't eat up the baby and wouldn't all the food build up if the baby were blocking the way to the intestine? Then I found porn which straightened a lot out for me. (My parents never gave me the talk and refused to let me take sex ed)

confused little boi

I used yo beleive yhat babies came out of a machine.

Connor

I used to think birth control was where you could choose the sex of your child.

Anon

When I was a child, I used to believe babies were born in cabbages. Once my mother brought a cabbage home and I was scared she would cut it and kill the baby, so I used a pen to try to dig a tiny hole in it to see the baby...
No need to say the cabbage was ruined.
I didn't get punished though, for my mother thought it was cute. But she did explain that babies were NOT born in cabbages... I remained doubtfull for a long time.

xd