rude bits

One day many moons ago, my aunt Phyllis was breast-feeding my cousin, and her friend's son was watching her intently. He asked her what she was doing, and she told him something to the effect of "feeding the baby her milk". The little boy sat for a minute and asked Phyllis, "Is there tea in the other one?"

TxTetley

When I was in sixth grade, I had snuck a medical book down from my parents' shelf to find out about girls' parts. Lo and behold, when I went to lunch the following day at school, I said to my friend "Jeff! Jeff! Girls have THREE holes! THREE of 'em!" Some of the guys at the lunch table looked at each other and said "No way!" and waved me off. Some of the girls looked at me as if I were nuts.

Russell

I remember at about 6, I used to play doctor with a little girl and I thought my penis looked like a hot dog, while her vagina sort of looked like a hot dog roll. I didn't know exactly how or why you would do it, but I thought they were made like that purposely, so the hot dog would fit in the roll.

fred

When I was a child, my mother referred to vaginas and penises as "pee-ers". You use it to pee, therefore, it is a pee-er! I truly believed that this was the technical term for them. It took years for me to understand that she only called them that since peeing is what they are used for.

Imagine my dismay when I when I started school and heard my teachers talking about being nice when playing with your your peers.

Jennifer

Until I was about nine, I thought that breasts were these white, conically shaped, spirally looking things. It wasn't until retrospection years later that I realized that was what the bra my mom wore looked like. (a la 1950's)

Jane

Until I was 15 I believed that men had a hole like a woman underneath their penis and that's how men had sex together.

Anon

I used to believe that inside my penis there was a snake, and each time i got a "hard on" the snake was trying to get out.

anon

When i was little i found a porn magazine on my dads side of the bed. He was a doctor so i figured that the magazine was labeling the peoples body parts... they were always especially detailed on the closeups!

Annie

I was told that my testis were a pillow for my penis by my mother when asked the difficult question of what they were for !

Nick

I used to think I could decide which sex I wanted to be when I grew up. I figured if the body can grow breasts, why not penises? Imagine my surprise when I found that the decision had already been made.

Trixie

I thought that boys' bikes had cross bars on them so they could lay their willies on it as they cycled.

Anne, Edinburgh

I used to think that the proper term for anus was "poonis". After all, you pee with your penis, so you must poo with your "poonis". Logical, eh?

Kdees

When I was younger being naive and geographically inept I assumed that every time someone refered to the "Nether Regions" I thougt they were on about Holland!

Blodwyn the Gerbil

When I was little, pre pubescent, I used to believe that my testicles were a spare set of eyeballs. I used to believe that they would sometimes migrate at night and change places. That way, you could give your eyes a break and let the spare ones take over for a while.:-)

Ron B 1-22-03

when i was about seven i thought that the whole ball came out when you had sex...i wasn't so much confused by the mis-match in the size of the opening (ouch), but because i was intersted in numbers i was confused because some people had more than two children in their family... i could only count two myself and i knew that must be right because my mum told me that you had two of everything down each side and one of everyting down the middle...anyway i justified it on the basis that your balls must regrow somehow...i suppose that i didn't really give it much more thought until i was about twelve and started experimenting and i found that i still had two whole balls and a messy splat on the floor

owen cash

I used to believe that boys penises could move independently like an Elephant's trunk and that they could pick up stuff with it.

Jenn

I know this guy named David who thought his penis was a tail. Well, one day his mom had friends over and he ran into the room yelling "Look mommy I can make my tail fat!". I wasn't there but his mother uses it to embarrase him, so of course I found out.

Zoe

I thought they pumped the milk into the boobies when you had your baby..like with a gas tank nozzle er something...

amonia

My Mum used to think that boys willys continued to grow longer as they got older. She thought that it would hang down one of their legs and this is why little boys could wear shorts but men had to wear trousers. This also explained the bulge in swimming trunks because the man had rolled it up.

Anon

I am disabled with cerebral palsy. When I was 9 -11 years old, I had physical therapy sessions 3 times a week. All of the sessions were coed with 8 - 10 kids in the same room. Most of them required the removal of most or all of our clothing. At this time I developed my own double standard on nudity. Seeing a girl in the nude (or being seen naked by a girl) anyplace other than the therapy room was an exciting experience. However, nudity in the room was just part of the session. That was 45 years ago but have vivid memories of a number of girls who I saw exercising – wearing nothing but a smile – and thinking, "I sure would love to see her dressed like that outside of therapy!"

Tom